Mike9595
Well-Known Member
I have one medical waiver but no issues legal waiver wise or any trouble with the law in any way. GPA was 3.19 and I do have some solid LORs. Hopefully that does it.
-
Please take a moment and update your account profile. If you have an updated account profile with basic information on why you are on Air Warriors it will help other people respond to your posts. How do you update your profile you ask?
Go here:
Edit Account Details and Profile
Motivational Statement MEGA Thread
- Thread starter FSF17
- Start date
I have one medical waiver but no issues legal waiver wise or any trouble with the law in any way. GPA was 3.19 and I do have some solid LORs. Hopefully that does it.
I have read some conflicting views on this, so I'll ask the question and hopefully someone with some recent insight can enlighten me.
Should the statement be written for Navy Officer or specific job title as a Navy Officer ie. Pilot, SWO, etc.?
I'm personally leaning toward the former but I'm wondering if the latter would be more appropriate and advantageous to be competitive per individual board.
Should the statement be written for Navy Officer or specific job title as a Navy Officer ie. Pilot, SWO, etc.?
I'm personally leaning toward the former but I'm wondering if the latter would be more appropriate and advantageous to be competitive per individual board.
Mike9595
Well-Known Member
So I have totally re-done my statement please take a look and let me know if there are any improvements I could make! Trying to have my recruiter resubmit my package!
Ever since a young age, I have had the desire to serve in the United States Armed forces; specifically the United States Navy. Throughout my life I have had multiple leadership opportunities and life lessons to assist me in obtaining this goal. From growing up on our family farm, to earning my bachelor's degree from Illinois State University, to leading a team of seventy personnel; each and every one of these experiences has helped hone in my desire, need and passion to join the United States Navy.
I grew up on a family farm in the Midwest where I had many opportunities throughout my young adult life to learn the importance of hard work and taking care of something other than myself. This included being given many opportunities to lead my peers in clubs such as 4-H and FFA, all while holding different leadership positions. During high school I was given the chance to attend class service trips to different Civil War and European Battlefields. While there, I helped restore American Soldiers headstones, and cared for the grounds in which they rested. This experience only cemented my desire, need and aspirations to serve my country and its people.
Upon graduation of high school, I attended Illinois State University working towards a degree in Agricultural Business and Business Administration. Throughout this time in college, I worked to further hone my leadership abilities by holding multiple leadership positions in clubs and internships. Through these rolls, I was given the ability to constructively critique myself and learn how to successfully lead teams; may they be of diverse backgrounds, different ages, or of different views. I learned to successfully motivate them each to reach and achieve common goals. Upon graduation I took a position with Target in Distribution Operations Management leading and motivating a team of seventy direct reports to meet and exceed daily production and safety goals.
During my two years of working with Target, I still hold the yearning and need to become a part of the United States Navy as a Naval Aviator. I constantly worked to make my dream become a reality. Through my experience of growing up on a farm, too interning with both large and small businesses, holding leadership positions in clubs throughout my young adult life and then to leading a team of seventy direct reports; I know I will be of value to the Navy with my strong work ethic and desire to work in a field I truly want to be a part of and serve with. I was always told and encouraged to follow my dreams. I never quit striving towards my goal, and have worked my hardest to achieve my dream. This is what I strive to bring to the Navy.
Sincerely,
Ever since a young age, I have had the desire to serve in the United States Armed forces; specifically the United States Navy. Throughout my life I have had multiple leadership opportunities and life lessons to assist me in obtaining this goal. From growing up on our family farm, to earning my bachelor's degree from Illinois State University, to leading a team of seventy personnel; each and every one of these experiences has helped hone in my desire, need and passion to join the United States Navy.
I grew up on a family farm in the Midwest where I had many opportunities throughout my young adult life to learn the importance of hard work and taking care of something other than myself. This included being given many opportunities to lead my peers in clubs such as 4-H and FFA, all while holding different leadership positions. During high school I was given the chance to attend class service trips to different Civil War and European Battlefields. While there, I helped restore American Soldiers headstones, and cared for the grounds in which they rested. This experience only cemented my desire, need and aspirations to serve my country and its people.
Upon graduation of high school, I attended Illinois State University working towards a degree in Agricultural Business and Business Administration. Throughout this time in college, I worked to further hone my leadership abilities by holding multiple leadership positions in clubs and internships. Through these rolls, I was given the ability to constructively critique myself and learn how to successfully lead teams; may they be of diverse backgrounds, different ages, or of different views. I learned to successfully motivate them each to reach and achieve common goals. Upon graduation I took a position with Target in Distribution Operations Management leading and motivating a team of seventy direct reports to meet and exceed daily production and safety goals.
During my two years of working with Target, I still hold the yearning and need to become a part of the United States Navy as a Naval Aviator. I constantly worked to make my dream become a reality. Through my experience of growing up on a farm, too interning with both large and small businesses, holding leadership positions in clubs throughout my young adult life and then to leading a team of seventy direct reports; I know I will be of value to the Navy with my strong work ethic and desire to work in a field I truly want to be a part of and serve with. I was always told and encouraged to follow my dreams. I never quit striving towards my goal, and have worked my hardest to achieve my dream. This is what I strive to bring to the Navy.
Sincerely,
Turtle5403
Well-Known Member
Hey everyone, If you guys wouldn't mind please take a look at my motivational statement. I will be applying for SNA. Thank you!
Throughout my life I have always put my country first. My search to continually serve my country has led me to hear the call of service once again, this time in the world’s finest Navy. The Navy’s core values of honor, courage, and commitment are virtues that I deeply believe in and have demonstrated in my life through prior experiences. I hope to continue to display these values through service in the United States Navy as an Aviator.
Becoming an Aviator in the Navy is something that I have been striving for all of my life. I can remember being a child and going to the airshow at NAS Willow Grove, it was something I looked forward to each and every year. The sounds and the sights were something that left me in awe year after year no matter how many times I went.
As I got older and went off to college, I knew that I lacked the discipline to become a Naval Aviator. I knew I needed to make a change in my life to make myself worthy of Naval Aviation, so I decided to enlist in the United States Army as an Infantryman. During my time in the Army I excelled at my job, constantly exceeding standards which led to me becoming an essential part of the Platoon. As a result, I was waivered for an early promotion to E4. During my deployment to Afghanistan I was relied upon countless times in combat as the Platoon’s Radio Telephone Operator. It was my job to relay accurate and timely information and to help track all the moving pieces of a combat operation which often included air assets. It was then that I was reminded of the true power of Naval Aviation. A show of force from an air asset we had on station could stop an impending ambush dead in its tracks; without even firing a shot an ambush could be diverted, potentially saving American lives. Each display of airpower left me in awe the same way the air shows did when I was a child.
Upon my arrival back from my deployment I was promoted to a Team Leader and I found myself in constant opportunities to challenge my team, myself, and my peers. I took advantage of each opportunity to continually learn and better myself. When it was time for me to leave the Army and attend college I knew that I had fully given myself to this great country. Through extremely hard work, I knew that I had left the Army a better man and one that possessed the proper discipline and mental fortitude required to become a potential future Naval Aviator.
During college I interned at the Federal Reserve System which is responsible for safeguarding and promoting a strong economy for the United States. Upon graduation, was offered a full-time position. I found myself enjoying the opportunity and enjoying the stable lifestyle it provided. I always knew that while I enjoyed it for the time being I would yearn for a challenge and the opportunity to join an elite force. Achieving my childhood goal of becoming a Naval Aviator is a lifestyle that I know will continually push me to my best. There is nothing more in this world that I want than the opportunity to prove to myself and loved ones that I belong with the world’s best pilots.
Through adversity and challenge I have been molded into a competent leader that I can only hope is worthy of being offered a chance to become a part of the most elite flying force the world has ever known. Whether it was my time in the Army rucking through the mountainous terrain of Afghanistan or at work for the nation’s economy at the Fed, I have always put my country first. I hope to continue to serve our great nation and put country first as a Naval Aviator.
Throughout my life I have always put my country first. My search to continually serve my country has led me to hear the call of service once again, this time in the world’s finest Navy. The Navy’s core values of honor, courage, and commitment are virtues that I deeply believe in and have demonstrated in my life through prior experiences. I hope to continue to display these values through service in the United States Navy as an Aviator.
Becoming an Aviator in the Navy is something that I have been striving for all of my life. I can remember being a child and going to the airshow at NAS Willow Grove, it was something I looked forward to each and every year. The sounds and the sights were something that left me in awe year after year no matter how many times I went.
As I got older and went off to college, I knew that I lacked the discipline to become a Naval Aviator. I knew I needed to make a change in my life to make myself worthy of Naval Aviation, so I decided to enlist in the United States Army as an Infantryman. During my time in the Army I excelled at my job, constantly exceeding standards which led to me becoming an essential part of the Platoon. As a result, I was waivered for an early promotion to E4. During my deployment to Afghanistan I was relied upon countless times in combat as the Platoon’s Radio Telephone Operator. It was my job to relay accurate and timely information and to help track all the moving pieces of a combat operation which often included air assets. It was then that I was reminded of the true power of Naval Aviation. A show of force from an air asset we had on station could stop an impending ambush dead in its tracks; without even firing a shot an ambush could be diverted, potentially saving American lives. Each display of airpower left me in awe the same way the air shows did when I was a child.
Upon my arrival back from my deployment I was promoted to a Team Leader and I found myself in constant opportunities to challenge my team, myself, and my peers. I took advantage of each opportunity to continually learn and better myself. When it was time for me to leave the Army and attend college I knew that I had fully given myself to this great country. Through extremely hard work, I knew that I had left the Army a better man and one that possessed the proper discipline and mental fortitude required to become a potential future Naval Aviator.
During college I interned at the Federal Reserve System which is responsible for safeguarding and promoting a strong economy for the United States. Upon graduation, was offered a full-time position. I found myself enjoying the opportunity and enjoying the stable lifestyle it provided. I always knew that while I enjoyed it for the time being I would yearn for a challenge and the opportunity to join an elite force. Achieving my childhood goal of becoming a Naval Aviator is a lifestyle that I know will continually push me to my best. There is nothing more in this world that I want than the opportunity to prove to myself and loved ones that I belong with the world’s best pilots.
Through adversity and challenge I have been molded into a competent leader that I can only hope is worthy of being offered a chance to become a part of the most elite flying force the world has ever known. Whether it was my time in the Army rucking through the mountainous terrain of Afghanistan or at work for the nation’s economy at the Fed, I have always put my country first. I hope to continue to serve our great nation and put country first as a Naval Aviator.
Kevin Derouen
New Member
I am posting my motivational statement below if anyone has any feedback it would be greatly appreciated. I am applying for SWO for the July board. My mentor is a Commander so I would like things to be scrubbed before I give him a bad product. Thank you in advance. You can either post back here or email to me.
I have a specific question relating to my situation. I was previously selected to be a Pilot in a USAF Rated Board, but was medically DQ'd and offered a non-rated (non flying position). I turned it down, and successfully underwent LASIK. I did just about everything I could to get the air force to waive my vision issue which took close to 2 years. Just under a year later, I am back in the application process. I need an opinion on whether I should OMIT that I was previously selected to be a pilot in the USAF or to OMIT that info on the motivation statement.
The positive side to including it would be that it shows a lot of dedication to resolving the issue and doing anything to become a military pilot rather than quitting. The negative would be that I initially wanted to be in the USAF and the members on the selection board could think that I slighted the Navy by applying to the air force first. I just turned 29, so I have to cover why it took me so long to get here.
Any advice or experience would be very appreciated as I am on the fence on how to process with writing my statement.
Thanks!
Some extra info:
I have my commercial-instrument pilot license with 300 hours
I didn't decide to join the military until my mother suffered a brain aneurysm in 2015, and pushed me to pursue flying and getting into this career.
I chose the USAF initially due to all of the media posting about the USAF pilot shortage, as well as having a great USAF recruiter off the bat.
My grandfather was a Naval Aviator
The positive side to including it would be that it shows a lot of dedication to resolving the issue and doing anything to become a military pilot rather than quitting. The negative would be that I initially wanted to be in the USAF and the members on the selection board could think that I slighted the Navy by applying to the air force first. I just turned 29, so I have to cover why it took me so long to get here.
Any advice or experience would be very appreciated as I am on the fence on how to process with writing my statement.
Thanks!
Some extra info:
I have my commercial-instrument pilot license with 300 hours
I didn't decide to join the military until my mother suffered a brain aneurysm in 2015, and pushed me to pursue flying and getting into this career.
I chose the USAF initially due to all of the media posting about the USAF pilot shortage, as well as having a great USAF recruiter off the bat.
My grandfather was a Naval Aviator
FormerRecruitingGuru
Making Recruiting Great Again
It's not so much omit, it's more of not necessary to even mention.
PRarce2
Member
I think it depends on the way you spin it. If you use it like how it motivated you and why now you have chosen the Navy.
I often mention on here it is a motivational statement and not extra space to restate your CV.
So, why did you pick the Navy now over the USAF?
If you mention it you better follow up with why you decided to switch. Can you tie that to a mentor or person who made you consider the Navy. That would be ideal.
FormerRecruitingGuru
Making Recruiting Great Again
Check out the statements folks have put up on this thread. There’s also some recruiter websites which you can find example statements (via google).
No need to overthink this.
E6BFlightComp
Active Member
Just as an added statement. My recruiter said that around 400 is the sweet spot, but to keep it under 600 words.
Hello y'all, I'm applying as an Intel Officer, and need help with my motivational statement (I believe it's the same as the essay if anyone could confirm). Feel free to tear it apart, and let me know if there's anything I can do to make it stand out. You could either reply here or inbox me. I'm planning to turn this in to my recruiter this week. A huge thank you to anyone who gives feedback on the following:
Throughout my entire life, I have dreamed of becoming a Navy Officer. Now, the time has come to bring that overreaching desire into fruition. Being fortunate enough to earn my degree, as a college student I was on the Dean's List all four years in college, graduated Cum Laude, volunteered in several organizations, and as a working professional always was a dedicated and self-motivated worker in every job I have had.
To be the child of a veteran I take great pride in this major part of who I am. During the Vietnam War, my father served proudly in the Army, so I have always desired to follow in his footsteps. In my pursuit for a Navy commission, one of my primary goals is to be challenged beyond my limits and to be forged with a new purpose in service and sacrifice to my country. When I attain this ultimate goal, like I have to my father I have no doubt my son will look also up to me as a role model as I lead other military members under my command to greater heights. Furthermore, he will see what it takes to be of high moral character, honor, and dignity.
Being a fast learner, I know that with any and all tasks the Navy will give me, I will be motivated to work at mastering them with my utmost motivation, determination, and effort. Whenever I have trained for any job in the past, I would be able to understand new material when presented with it for the first time. As a military officer my competence and intelligence will be utilized for something bigger than myself, which I believe with all my being is my highest calling. Highlighting all the training roles I had in my past for different jobs, I have gravitated toward leadership roles in my careers. Before seeking a commission as a Navy Officer, I already have real world experiences as a leader ranging from being a teacher, a coach, and a trainer all in various career paths.
Lastly, I would be humbled and honored to receive a commission as a Navy Officer eager to become a leader among leaders. For the last two decades I have prepared myself physically, mentally, and intellectually to achieve my ultimate career goal of service in the Navy. Regarding my overreaching aim of becoming a leader in the U.S. military, my skill of taking careful, analytical action in everyday life has prepared me to face trials and obstacles that I will have to overcome in the future as a Navy Officer.
Throughout my entire life, I have dreamed of becoming a Navy Officer. Now, the time has come to bring that overreaching desire into fruition. Being fortunate enough to earn my degree, as a college student I was on the Dean's List all four years in college, graduated Cum Laude, volunteered in several organizations, and as a working professional always was a dedicated and self-motivated worker in every job I have had.
To be the child of a veteran I take great pride in this major part of who I am. During the Vietnam War, my father served proudly in the Army, so I have always desired to follow in his footsteps. In my pursuit for a Navy commission, one of my primary goals is to be challenged beyond my limits and to be forged with a new purpose in service and sacrifice to my country. When I attain this ultimate goal, like I have to my father I have no doubt my son will look also up to me as a role model as I lead other military members under my command to greater heights. Furthermore, he will see what it takes to be of high moral character, honor, and dignity.
Being a fast learner, I know that with any and all tasks the Navy will give me, I will be motivated to work at mastering them with my utmost motivation, determination, and effort. Whenever I have trained for any job in the past, I would be able to understand new material when presented with it for the first time. As a military officer my competence and intelligence will be utilized for something bigger than myself, which I believe with all my being is my highest calling. Highlighting all the training roles I had in my past for different jobs, I have gravitated toward leadership roles in my careers. Before seeking a commission as a Navy Officer, I already have real world experiences as a leader ranging from being a teacher, a coach, and a trainer all in various career paths.
Lastly, I would be humbled and honored to receive a commission as a Navy Officer eager to become a leader among leaders. For the last two decades I have prepared myself physically, mentally, and intellectually to achieve my ultimate career goal of service in the Navy. Regarding my overreaching aim of becoming a leader in the U.S. military, my skill of taking careful, analytical action in everyday life has prepared me to face trials and obstacles that I will have to overcome in the future as a Navy Officer.
GAhnee
Well-Known Member
Hey guys, this is my second attempt at the SWO board. I have been working with my recruiter to revise my motivational statement and I just wanted to post my most recent revision after taking his comments into consideration. I have a low GPA, and I was advised by a LCDR who wrote one of my letters of rec and has sat on SWO boards to include why my gpa is low, which is why the bit about retaking classes is in there. I’d appreciate some constructive feedback to help me improve this!
exNavyOffRec
Well-Known Member
The statement about why your GPA is low could help IF and that is a big IF they decide to read your statement, many times the statements are only read trying to figure out the last few spots. I have seen people with low GPA selected and in general it was boards with higher selection rates, the upcoming board could be interesting with the last board being rolled into the next one.
GAhnee
Well-Known Member
The way I understood your comment was that you thought I was making a separate document about my GPA. I was advised to include it in my motivational statement, which is what I did here. If I misunderstood you, then are you saying that they don’t read the motivational statements? I was told it is looked over quickly and key noteworthy things were circled when the board member briefing your package is presenting it. I was also told that each letter of recommendation must be put up and shown, so having well written ones is a very key thing.