U-2 Pictures, as requested

[llnick2001]

Oh, the things I have to look foward to...

 

[Intruder Driver]

Wouldn't that be a an interesting TFOA report...

I bet A4s has had some blue ice bomb releases during his airline career.

 

[HAL Pilot]

I bet A4s has had some blue ice bomb releases during his airline career.

Contrary to popular opinion, those blue ice bombs only happen if there is a leak. No way to do that on purpose.

But if we could......

Flying Karachi to Diego after a RO2N, everyone on the plane has the shits except me and the AWC. We took our own food and refused to eat the local garbage (everyone took their own water). Most guys had their bags with their extra clothes in the bombay. Long lines for the one and only head, with the AWC and me happily keeping track of all the cases of beer the crew was quickly buying. By the time the we approached Diego, 4 or 5 guys were walking around in flight boots, under shorts, (in one case borrowed off the body of another guy) and LPAs (they didn't make it through the line in time....). One guy had his t-shirt on as under shorts. The rest had sacrificed their t-shirts after we ran out of TP. Ugly scene but a great drunk afterward.

When we landed on Diego, the Brit customs guys came out to the plane. Everyone was standing there in there scivvies with their garbage bags of poo. Custom guy says "whats in the bag". PPC say "shit". Customs guys says "Huh? open it up so I can a look". PPC says "ummmm.....OK" and hands it to the Customs guy. Customs guy opens it, sticks his head down to look inside, squeals like a stuffed pig and vomits. PPC says "I told you it was shit. We just came in from Karachi". Other 2 Brit Customs guys howling. They all came for the beer.

 

[HeloBubba]

Climb over console, empty helmetbag, and to the horror of the AW1 in the back, shed vest, drop trou...

Wait. Weren't you in a standard flight suit? It is not just a matter of dropping trou, you have to essentially strip to the waist and then some. Your sensor operator was experiencing horror at the possibility of seeing more of you than he needed to, not to mention the smell. Dare I ask what you used to wipe?

 

[llnick2001]

This thread is quite literally headed down the shitter...

 

[East]

............. Dare I ask what you used to wipe?

WTF for????

 

[Gatordev]

Wait. Weren't you in a standard flight suit? It is not just a matter of dropping trou, you have to essentially strip to the waist and then some. Your sensor operator was experiencing horror at the possibility of seeing more of you than he needed to, not to mention the smell. Dare I ask what you used to wipe?

Yup. It's a relatively common occurrence nowadays, probably one a cruise or so. My "emergency" wasn't as bad and made it until flight quarters, but I can tell you the side mounted FLIR is pee-proof.

 

[ea6bflyr]

We had a guy with a "pfeltzer valve failure" during cruise and he was dubbed DOOKIE for a few weeks before we went back to his old callsign.

-ea6bflyr

 

[phrogpilot73]

Deja Vouz...

 

[Mumbles]

Somebody told me yesterday that the Steeler's running back Najeh Davenport is being called Dookie by his teammates because he went over to his ex girlfriends house and shit in her clothes hamper.

 

[HuggyU2]

And, right on back to the "Jets make you poo" thread - what if you have to take a piss or shit?

There is no option for #2, unless you join the Strato-Shitters Club. As I mentioned, it damages the suit. Additionally, if you do not elect to RTB, you could end up with some skin problems from sitting and stewing in your own feces. This is especially true, and has happened, following a pilot's previous night's dinner in Korea where said pilot ate spicy bugogi. The resulting blow out and sitting in it resulted in some real bad skin irritation. Basically, it burned him.
When we where the suit, we wear cotton under wear like long johns and a long sleeve shirt. You also put on a Urine Collection Device (UCD), bascially a very large, heavy gauge rubber condom. The is a small hole in the top of the UCD: this is important, and I'll explain in a minute. When you get in the suit, it connects to a tube in the suit. That tube is connected to an external tube via a valve on the inside of the left thigh. When you want to piss, you blow the suit up: we have an aneroid controller that allows us to control the amount of pressure in the suit. When the suit "blows up", it's like a balloon. When you open the valve, you've now force a leak to occur, just like putting a small hole in your car tire. In our case, the high pressure air inside the suit flows through that hole in the top of the UCD, and right out the tube into the piss bucket in the belly of the jet. As you urinate, the liquid is moved by the flow of rushing air toward the leak, i.e. toward the piss bucket. Works like a champ.

 

[Lawman]

There is no option for #2, unless you join the Strato-Shitters Club. As I mentioned, it damages the suit. Additionally, if you do not elect to RTB, you could end up with some skin problems from sitting and stewing in your own feces. This is especially true, and has happened, following a pilot's previous night's dinner in Korea where said pilot ate spicy bugogi. The resulting blow out and sitting in it resulted in some real bad skin irritation. Basically, it burned him.
When we where the suit, we wear cotton under wear like long johns and a long sleeve shirt. You also put on a Urine Collection Device (UCD), bascially a very large, heavy gauge rubber condom. The is a small hole in the top of the UCD: this is important, and I'll explain in a minute. When you get in the suit, it connects to a tube in the suit. That tube is connected to an external tube via a valve on the inside of the left thigh. When you want to piss, you blow the suit up: we have an aneroid controller that allows us to control the amount of pressure in the suit. When the suit "blows up", it's like a balloon. When you open the valve, you've now force a leak to occur, just like putting a small hole in your car tire. In our case, the high pressure air inside the suit flows through that hole in the top of the UCD, and right out the tube into the piss bucket in the belly of the jet. As you urinate, the liquid is moved by the flow of rushing air toward the leak, i.e. toward the piss bucket. Works like a champ.

The whole time Im reading this Im just thinking, "wow... what did that cost to develop."

Only had once incedent where Ive ever seen anybody crap in my limited flight time. But that guy was buying drinks for the other 3 of us in the plane for quite some time after. Ive pissed in a water bottle many a time.

 

[llnick2001]

I'll never say the Air Force is weak on systems knowledge again.

 

[HeloBubba]

There is no option for #2, ...

Thanks for answering Huggy.

 

[KSUFLY]

There is no option for #2, unless you join the Strato-Shitters Club. As I mentioned, it damages the suit. Additionally, if you do not elect to RTB, you could end up with some skin problems from sitting and stewing in your own feces. This is especially true, and has happened, following a pilot's previous night's dinner in Korea where said pilot ate spicy bugogi. The resulting blow out and sitting in it resulted in some real bad skin irritation. Basically, it burned him.
When we where the suit, we wear cotton under wear like long johns and a long sleeve shirt. You also put on a Urine Collection Device (UCD), bascially a very large, heavy gauge rubber condom. The is a small hole in the top of the UCD: this is important, and I'll explain in a minute. When you get in the suit, it connects to a tube in the suit. That tube is connected to an external tube via a valve on the inside of the left thigh. When you want to piss, you blow the suit up: we have an aneroid controller that allows us to control the amount of pressure in the suit. When the suit "blows up", it's like a balloon. When you open the valve, you've now force a leak to occur, just like putting a small hole in your car tire. In our case, the high pressure air inside the suit flows through that hole in the top of the UCD, and right out the tube into the piss bucket in the belly of the jet. As you urinate, the liquid is moved by the flow of rushing air toward the leak, i.e. toward the piss bucket. Works like a champ.

Wow...I could never fly the U-2. I hate condoms!