It's not about being being obsequious or professionally respectful. It's about opening your eyes to the truth. That's why we're being frank with you - because we don't want you to go down a path that you'll ultimately be dissatisfied with.
Brett
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Not a "spouse", but seemed appropriate.
- Thread starter UHundergrad
- Start date
It's not about being being obsequious or professionally respectful. It's about opening your eyes to the truth. That's why we're being frank with you - because we don't want you to go down a path that you'll ultimately be dissatisfied with.
Brett
Yea, it's about keeping it real.
helo_wifey
Well-Known Member
She's your fiancee for a reason. You just have to be able to sit down and have that conversation with her. If you can't, then you might need to rethink your commitment to each other. Communication is the key to a lasting relationship. You guys are going to go through a lot in the next 10 years, flight school, your first fleet tour (which I'm finding out is hard, in many ways), and other stuff too. You're going to need to be able to talk. You're still young obviously, so stay true to yourself. Things will work out if they're supposed to.
Besides, HD, not all women are the root of all evil. You got cookies from me, so I want to hear some positive women comments now!!
Is this what you were looking for??
Besides, HD, not all women are the root of all evil. You got cookies from me, so I want to hear some positive women comments now!!
Is this what you were looking for??
You got cookies from me, so I want to hear some positive women comments now!!
Coolest wife ever.
Taking care of Midshipmen is the coolest thing to do, especially when the mid doesn't know how to cook!amen brett
Sorry to be a real person here, but I am a JAG and my husband is a sub nuke. We both made the decision to join together. There is more to life than your career, no matter what career you choose. You wouldn't take a job in Texas if you and your fiancee lived in New York without talking to her, so why wouldn't you talk to her about this? Not every woman is sitting around waiting for some man to take care of, but we all want to be part of the decisions that affect or lives, and like it or not, this affects us as much, if not more, than it affects you. It sounds like no matter what service you go in, you will be flying somehow, doing similar things. Our life changes drastically everytime you move or get moved. We have to find new jobs, new friends, while your guys have that stuff built in.
Don't act like you guys just go home and tell your wives how it is going to be, cause that just doesn't happen. Don't make a new guy think that you guys are really jerks like that. Cause you definately not if you are getting cookies int he mail!
Don't act like you guys just go home and tell your wives how it is going to be, cause that just doesn't happen. Don't make a new guy think that you guys are really jerks like that. Cause you definately not if you are getting cookies int he mail!
I'm a real person too
Good advice though... although I have to say, real men love cookies... and limes:tongue2_1
1. I'm not married, engaged or in a monogamous relationship, I do not answer to a S.O.
2. I am a jerk, it isn't a facade.
3. Helo_Wifey is the best wife ever for sending me cookies. She is an exception to the rule of marriage.
I'll stop there before I get JAG'ed.
Note: Number 3 is a positive comment about women!
Coldnavy
CTO1 to IW Officer
Reality Check in order
UH,
I don’t want to come off as mean or cruel, but don’t join the service. Really, I mean it. If you’re already showing concerns about being separated from your significant other for long periods of time, then I hate to tell you this, but you might want to reconsider your career choice. Every branch of service has deployment obligations to meet, and for the most part, there’re not short.
Sorry for the reality check, but you’re not the first person on any of these boards to boast concerns about being separated for long periods of time before you actually join.
UH,
I don’t want to come off as mean or cruel, but don’t join the service. Really, I mean it. If you’re already showing concerns about being separated from your significant other for long periods of time, then I hate to tell you this, but you might want to reconsider your career choice. Every branch of service has deployment obligations to meet, and for the most part, there’re not short.
Sorry for the reality check, but you’re not the first person on any of these boards to boast concerns about being separated for long periods of time before you actually join.
Hmmm... I get where you're going, Coldnavy, but I respectfully disagree. Showing concern about being separated doesn't mean you're making a bad career choice. If concern is coupled with fear or doubt, then the career choice is probably bad. My husband was "concerned" about being separated, but neither of us ever thought this was the wrong career choice because of it. It's a sacrifice we're both willing to make and we honestly couldn't be happier. Sure, I will miss my husband when he deploys... I think it's only natural in a healthy relationship. But neither of us are going to fall apart and neither of us regret the lifestyle in the least.
Coldnavy
CTO1 to IW Officer
True and Untrue
Ok, I get where you are coming from...to a point, and I agree with you…to a point. BUT, and this is a big one... When one chooses to join the military this generally means accepting the sacrifices that come with the honor of wearing the uniform. Bouncing around, looking for jobs or branches or service with little to no sea duty or deployment time just goes to show the level of selfishness one is willing to go to better themselves over all else.
Ok, I get where you are coming from...to a point, and I agree with you…to a point. BUT, and this is a big one... When one chooses to join the military this generally means accepting the sacrifices that come with the honor of wearing the uniform. Bouncing around, looking for jobs or branches or service with little to no sea duty or deployment time just goes to show the level of selfishness one is willing to go to better themselves over all else.
UHundergrad
New Member
I think my point has become misconstrued. I am going into the service, with our without her. I'm just willing to sacrafice something of mine to meet her halfway. I was taught to believe that I would ship off substantially less in the CG compared to Army aviation, and that I would be based in the states. The "perks" I was mostly concerned about is my fiancee has a syndrome to where if she is subjected to extreme cold (below 0), she could go into seizure. That would be my only concern about basing. Chances are I'm still going to go Army, I would just like to make my aviation career less of a sting for her. It's not all about me, all the time.
Coldnavy, you really like those titles, huh? 
And I agree with you... of course this lifestyle comes with huge sacrifices on both ends and both people need to evaluate whether they're individiually willing/able to embrace those sacrifices. I think that if you had coupled what you just said with your first post, your thoughts would have been better explained. But I still wouldn't have agreed with outright telling him not to join because that's a personal decision, but that's neither here nor there. Anyway, I hope your OCS package goes through!
And I agree with you... of course this lifestyle comes with huge sacrifices on both ends and both people need to evaluate whether they're individiually willing/able to embrace those sacrifices. I think that if you had coupled what you just said with your first post, your thoughts would have been better explained. But I still wouldn't have agreed with outright telling him not to join because that's a personal decision, but that's neither here nor there. Anyway, I hope your OCS package goes through!
You have somewhat redeemed yourself.