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Marriage during the aviation pipeline

D

Dinosaurologist

Active Member
Hey guys, I’m trying to go the USMC aviation route. If I want to get married sometime during the whole pipeline, when would be the best time do that?

I hear that after TBS, there is usually a few months before API starts. What should I expect during that time?
 
Skywalker

Skywalker

Student Naval Aviator
Dinosaurologist said:
Hey guys, I’m trying to go the USMC aviation route. If I want to get married sometime during the whole pipeline, when would be the best time do that?

I hear that after TBS, there is usually a few months before API starts. What should I expect during that time?
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Expect NASC to be absolute assholes about granting leave - even if you're in the pool, even to get married. Ask me how I know about that one.

All of the primary squadrons and TWs would probably let you take leave to do that, especially in between syllabi. Can't speak for the MATSG's - they sound like a mixed bag.

Also, they stopped calling it API years ago!
 
FLGUY

FLGUY

“Technique only”
pilot
Contributor
Skywalker said:
Expect NASC to be absolute assholes about granting leave - even if you're in the pool, even to get married. Ask me how I know about that one.

All of the primary squadrons and TWs would probably let you take leave to do that, especially in between syllabi. Can't speak for the MATSG's - they sound like a mixed bag.

Also, they stopped calling it API years ago!
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API just sounds so much better, and significantly less pretentious than “NIFE”.

But yeah, what is it with Schools Command being absolute dickheads about everything? That place is straight up draconian at times.
 
D

Dinosaurologist

Active Member
Interesting. I’m wondering if I could do it just right after TBS. From what I hear, it sounds like it’s pretty chill before going to NIFE/API.
 
Skywalker

Skywalker

Student Naval Aviator
Dinosaurologist said:
Interesting. I’m wondering if I could do it just right after TBS. From what I hear, it sounds like it’s pretty chill before going to NIFE/API.
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If nobody who knows better replies: find Marines ahead of you who can tell you which MATSG will be most permissive. Count on NASC (the command that owns NIFE) saying no.
 
Swanee

Swanee

Cereal Killer
pilot
None
Contributor
Dinosaurologist said:
Interesting. I’m wondering if I could do it just right after TBS. From what I hear, it sounds like it’s pretty chill before going to NIFE/API.
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Plan on the Marine Corps to expect you to get married over a federal holiday. You most likely won't get leave, but you'll probably get special liberty over a 4 day weekend to get married. So you'll fly out Friday, get married Saturday, have Sunday for family and to try to catch up on the studying you didn't do, travel home on Monday, and have the 0600 brief on Tuesday. You'll probably ready room down that flight.


Honestly if you're thinking about needing to take leave to get married during TBS or flight school, or your first fleet tour, your priorities absolutely don't align with what the Marine Corps wants out of you.

The Air National Guard is always hiring the right folks. We take care of people in ways the AD forces could only dream about. Choose your future wisely.
 
J

jointhelocalizer

Well-Known Member
pilot
FLGUY said:
API just sounds so much better, and significantly less pretentious than “NIFE”.

But yeah, what is it with Schools Command being absolute dickheads about everything? That place is straight up draconian at times.
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I think it is a mix of instructors being bitter that they got sent there and a combination of student intimidation, inexperience, and transience that prevents meaningful complaints from being sent up. Plus, there were also certain GS employees who seemed to get their jollies from ruining the days of SNAs/SNFOs/SNFSs for pedantry in Flight Management. And the "It was this way when I went through" factor also plays in.
 
Waveoff

Waveoff

Per Diem Mafia
None
Just something to think about, if you are ready to propose (or already have), you should be ready to sign the dotted line the next day. Consider getting paper married to take advantage of tricare, dependent pay, etc, while you wait for the opportune time to have your "party ceremony and honeymoon". That being said, my wife wanted to wait so we did, but I know plenty who got paper married first.
 
J

jointhelocalizer

Well-Known Member
pilot
Dinosaurologist said:
Interesting. I’m wondering if I could do it just right after TBS. From what I hear, it sounds like it’s pretty chill before going to NIFE/API.
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Do it during a break that allows you a few weeks of leave if you want to do your honeymoon soon after the wedding. In the syllabus, I have seen at most Friday thru Monday off. Don't be surprised if you receive some pushback or the command tells you to change your wedding date. I have seen that happen to a few friends.
 
hlg6016

hlg6016

A/C Wings Here
Swanee said:
Plan on the Marine Corps to expect you to get married over a federal holiday. You most likely won't get leave, but you'll probably get special liberty over a 4 day weekend to get married. So you'll fly out Friday, get married Saturday, have Sunday for family and to try to catch up on the studying you didn't do, travel home on Monday, and have the 0600 brief on Tuesday. You'll probably ready room down that flight.


Honestly if you're thinking about needing to take leave to get married during TBS or flight school, or your first fleet tour, your priorities absolutely don't align with what the Marine Corps wants out of you.

The Air National Guard is always hiring the right folks. We take care of people in ways the AD forces could only dream about. Choose your future wisely.
Click to expand...
I was given Friday off to do the deed and told to report for duty Tuesday morning. (This was FMF)
 
Hotdogs

Hotdogs

I don’t care if I hurt your feelings
pilot
Swanee said:
Plan on the Marine Corps to expect you to get married over a federal holiday. You most likely won't get leave, but you'll probably get special liberty over a 4 day weekend to get married. So you'll fly out Friday, get married Saturday, have Sunday for family and to try to catch up on the studying you didn't do, travel home on Monday, and have the 0600 brief on Tuesday. You'll probably ready room down that flight.


Honestly if you're thinking about needing to take leave to get married during TBS or flight school, or your first fleet tour, your priorities absolutely don't align with what the Marine Corps wants out of you.

The Air National Guard is always hiring the right folks. We take care of people in ways the AD forces could only dream about. Choose your future wisely.
Click to expand...
hlg6016 said:
I was given Friday off to do the deed and told to report for duty Tuesday morning. (This was FMF)
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Never seen any of these two examples happen in my career. Most Commands I’ve seen have been willing to work around major life events including weddings, hospitalizations, and child births. Typically good judgement applies (Taking discretionary leave in the middle of training exercise is probably a bad idea). Emergency leave has never been an issue. The rare exceptions have only been on deployments. Lots of service-members get married or take leave during holidays to string together 96s and 72s to maximize time off. I took a week off in my FRS syllabus for a family “crisis” and had zero repercussions (It didn’t trigger emergency leave or generate a Red Cross message).

If your command denies leave for one of these events then it better come straight from the CO’s mouth in a face to face. Otherwise request mast to the first 0-6 and have all your buddies sit down and write the paperwork with you. I’d recommend getting married before starting flight school or right after winging/before checking into the FRS. Purely for simplicities sake with all the variables in the pipeline. I’ve had leave denied exactly zero times in my entire career and never been told to modify based off some arbitrary time constraints. Communication and common sense will go a long way.
 
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