7+ hours, Afghanistan, October 2001. And if your ship ever runs out of piddle packs like the Enterprise did, a gatorade bottle will do nicely.
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Longest Flight?
- Thread starter FlyinRock
- Start date
Not too much of a story. I was the junior B/N, so had to walk aboard for start of cruise. Manned up a hot seat w/ the junior pilot (who was also an LSO, so he should have known what he needed) for a touch & go and a trap to get his two day landings to go at night.
Take off, immediate turn downwind and instead of hook up T&G, he puts the hook down and we trap. As we trap, we also break the jet, so we have to change jets (0.1 flight time). Man up the next hot seat, launch into the pattern for one more trap, 0.2 flight time - must have had to extend upwind and be long in the groove to milk out that extra 0.1. Get out of the jet, make the walk of shame to get yelled at by the Boss for not knowing our CQ requirements. Get back to the Ready Room for more yelling as we single handedly caused the entire flight schedule to fall apart.
Told to join CAG Paddles when he came off the Platform to get his traps. Took two traps w/ him for a 0.3 of flight time.
Manned up at night for a cold start pinkie launch into an extended downwind trap that was perhaps five minutes after "official sunset" for the night check in the block and a swap out (0.3 flight time, 0.1 night)
My best logbook entry was 52 hours and 51 traps in one calendar month. Sometimes it pays to get to fly with the heavies and all the stray cats & dogs. Most times it sucks though.
Our PR's brought something like 2000 on cruise with us. We were not playing that game. We had a guy in our squadron that pissed in a water bottle that had some kind of straw in it. Took one piss on deck, then a few hours later (with a cabin alt of 10K') opened it up to take another, well the bottle pressure was still at sea level, and it shot piss all over the cockpit as the pressure equalized. Made for a hilarious story, only after a MAF showed up a few days later that the cockpit had a "funny" smell.
A4sForever said:
HokiePilot said:
A couple of more to add to the list:
"Cheap Suit" 299.5 [as in $29.95]
"Give me change" 252.5 [as in two quarters]
Friend of mine launched as a day yo-yo tanker (should have been about 20 minutes of flight time) that turned into a like a 5 or 7 hour tanking flight. (Sorry I do not remember specifics except for his mad dash past paddles to the head gear half off to take a growler that had a charlie time hours earlier. 
The NFO on the flight has a DH who sounded a little like Milton from Office Space.
The NFO on the flight has a DH who sounded a little like Milton from Office Space.
Launched out of Fallon, jumped across the range where I met Okie from VF-31 who was on-station and anxiously waiting. One SERIOUSLY long engagement followed by a "Hey ah, Zipper. Let's knock it off, deck!" as Okie labored to bring his stead under control while nose low descending into a perfectly placed valley. "You got the lead, let's go home." Into the break at 450 kts, landed and shutdown for a whopping .7 of flight time. A perfect example of MY kind of long flight!
Don't know the squadron, but would his first/last name initials have been "K.N." ... ???
A.k.a. ... "Papa Golf" ... a.k.a. "puss-gut" ???
Anyone ever heard "Nippon Army roll-call" out over the Pacific @ night while monitoring 128.95 common??? Funny as hell ...Can we hear a little more about in-flight entertainment?
I suppose this would be primarily directed at P-3s, Hercs, AF heavies, and airline heavy drivers ....
phrogpilot73
Well-Known Member
8.0 hours is my longest (I've got longer days, but they were on ferry flights and we hopped out to fuel/file so they don't count) with 7.6 of it on goggles.
The Phrog also has to have its heads inspected every 8 hours, which requires a shut down. Hence the reason my longest is 8.0.
The Phrog also has to have its heads inspected every 8 hours, which requires a shut down. Hence the reason my longest is 8.0.
Do squadrons still have "Falcon code" cards?
^ If not -- they should.
Feel free to borrow as necessary from this "sanitized" version:
[FONT="]FALCON CODES[/FONT], circa 1972-73
0 FUCKKKK!
00 SH!T HOT
000 IF CAG SAW THAT HE'D SH!T
101 YOU'VE GOT TO BE SH!TTING ME
102 GET OFF MY @!#$!NG BACK
103 BEATS THE SH!T OUT OF ME
104 WHAT THE @!#$, OVER
105 ITS SO @!#$!NG BAD I CAN'T BELIEVE IT
106 I HATE THIS @!#$!NG PLACE
107 THIS PLACE SUCKS
108 @!#$ YOU VERY MUCH
109 THAT GDSOB
110 BEAUTIFUL. JUST @!#$!NG BEAUTIFUL
111 HERE COMES ANOTHER @!#$!NG CAG OPS BRAINSTORM
112 BIG @!#$!NG DEAL
113 LET ME TALK TO THAT SOB
114 GET YOUR SH!T TOGETHER
115 YOU BET YOUR SWEET A$$
116 @!#$ IT
117 I LOVE YOU SO @!#$!NG MUCH I COULD SH!T
118 WE EAT THIS SH!T UP
119 ADIOS MOTHER FU_KER
120 THAT'S A NO-NO
121 @!#$ IT I GOT MINE - FIIGMO
124 THAT GOD DAMN "O" CLUB
126 YOU PISS ME OFF
136 IF YOU ASK FOR ANOTHER LOW PA$$ ONE MORE TIME YOU WILL NOT GET LAUNCHED FOR A @!#$!NG WEEK
137 YOU MAY NOT HAVE ANY @!#$!NG FUEL
138 MY @!#$!NG BLADDER HURTS
139 I HAVE A @!#$!NG PROSTATE OVERPRESSURE LIGHT
140 COMEX MOTHER FU_KER
141 THAT @!#$!NG CIC IS DREAMING AGAIN
142 THE @!#$!NG HELOS ARE ALL FU_KED UP AGAIN
143 IT'S THE AIR BOSS' FAULT
144 SHUT-UP AND FLY THE @!#$!NG AIRPLANE
209 WHILE YOU WERE GONE THE WHOLE WORLD TURNED TO SH!T
221 @!#$ YOU AND THE HORSE YOU RODE IN ON
222 YOU MAY NOT LIKE THE @!#$!NG CAG STAFF BUT THE CAG STAFF LIKES @!#$!NG YOU
223 GET YOUR HEAD OUT OF YOUR A$$
224 YOU SAY "I DON'T KNOW" ONE MORE TIME AND I'M GONNA SHOVE A SONOBOUY UP YOUR A$$
225 YOU MUST HAVE SH!T FOR BRAINS
226 WOULD YOU LIKE A KICK IN THE A$$ TO HELP GET YOU AIRBORNE?
227 WHAT DOES IT TAKE TO GET A CLEARANCE OUT OF THIS @!#$!NG PLACE?
228 JUST FLY THE IRON BUS AND LEAVE THE AAW TO US
229 YOU'RE SO @!#$!NG STUPID YOU'RE A MENACE TO SOCIETY
230 THIS BASTARD HAS MORE DOWNING GRIPES THAN THE USS ARIZONA
231 COMMENTS AND RECOMMENDATIONS MY A$$
232 JUST OUT OF CURIOSITY GATOR, WHERE THE @!#$ ARE WE?
233 IT'S INTERVAL, AS FAR AS I'M CIRCUMCISED
269 EXCUSE ME SIR, BUT YOU OBVIOUSLY HAVE ME CONFUSED WITH SOMEBODY WHO GIVES A SH!T
500 THOSE @!#$!NG BLACK SHOE MUTHER FU_KERS
501 THOSE @!#$!NG REAR ECHELON MUTHER FU_KERS
600 THOSE @!#$!NG ASW PUKES
641 HANG IT IN YOUR @!#$!NG EAR
700 @!#$!NG GRUNTS
728 IF I HEAR "CV" CONCEPT ONE MORE TIME I'M GONNA PUKE
750 THAT FU_KER RUNS LIKE A WELL OILED MACHINE
775 YOUR OLD LADY WEARS COMBAT BOOTS
800 I LOVE THIS SO MUCH I CAN'T SH!T
901 IF IT'S SUCH A GOOD @!#$!NG DEAL, SEND ________
902 IF I CALLED FOR SH!T YOU'D COME SLIDING IN ON A SHOVEL
1000 COOL IT THE PADRE IS HERE
3000 HAY FOR THE HORSES, WHISKEY FOR MY MEN AND A PLATE OF FLIES FOR MY TOAD
3001 HE'S SO LIGHT HE'S A MENACE TO AVIATION
3002 HE JUST HAD HIS @!#$!NG TUBES CUT
3003 HE HASN'T HAD HIS LOBOTOMY YET
3031 NOT SO @!#$!NG FAST
Feel free to borrow as necessary from this "sanitized" version:
[FONT="]FALCON CODES[/FONT], circa 1972-73
0 FUCKKKK!
00 SH!T HOT
000 IF CAG SAW THAT HE'D SH!T
101 YOU'VE GOT TO BE SH!TTING ME
102 GET OFF MY @!#$!NG BACK
103 BEATS THE SH!T OUT OF ME
104 WHAT THE @!#$, OVER
105 ITS SO @!#$!NG BAD I CAN'T BELIEVE IT
106 I HATE THIS @!#$!NG PLACE
107 THIS PLACE SUCKS
108 @!#$ YOU VERY MUCH
109 THAT GDSOB
110 BEAUTIFUL. JUST @!#$!NG BEAUTIFUL
111 HERE COMES ANOTHER @!#$!NG CAG OPS BRAINSTORM
112 BIG @!#$!NG DEAL
113 LET ME TALK TO THAT SOB
114 GET YOUR SH!T TOGETHER
115 YOU BET YOUR SWEET A$$
116 @!#$ IT
117 I LOVE YOU SO @!#$!NG MUCH I COULD SH!T
118 WE EAT THIS SH!T UP
119 ADIOS MOTHER FU_KER
120 THAT'S A NO-NO
121 @!#$ IT I GOT MINE - FIIGMO
124 THAT GOD DAMN "O" CLUB
126 YOU PISS ME OFF
136 IF YOU ASK FOR ANOTHER LOW PA$$ ONE MORE TIME YOU WILL NOT GET LAUNCHED FOR A @!#$!NG WEEK
137 YOU MAY NOT HAVE ANY @!#$!NG FUEL
138 MY @!#$!NG BLADDER HURTS
139 I HAVE A @!#$!NG PROSTATE OVERPRESSURE LIGHT
140 COMEX MOTHER FU_KER
141 THAT @!#$!NG CIC IS DREAMING AGAIN
142 THE @!#$!NG HELOS ARE ALL FU_KED UP AGAIN
143 IT'S THE AIR BOSS' FAULT
144 SHUT-UP AND FLY THE @!#$!NG AIRPLANE
209 WHILE YOU WERE GONE THE WHOLE WORLD TURNED TO SH!T
221 @!#$ YOU AND THE HORSE YOU RODE IN ON
222 YOU MAY NOT LIKE THE @!#$!NG CAG STAFF BUT THE CAG STAFF LIKES @!#$!NG YOU
223 GET YOUR HEAD OUT OF YOUR A$$
224 YOU SAY "I DON'T KNOW" ONE MORE TIME AND I'M GONNA SHOVE A SONOBOUY UP YOUR A$$
225 YOU MUST HAVE SH!T FOR BRAINS
226 WOULD YOU LIKE A KICK IN THE A$$ TO HELP GET YOU AIRBORNE?
227 WHAT DOES IT TAKE TO GET A CLEARANCE OUT OF THIS @!#$!NG PLACE?
228 JUST FLY THE IRON BUS AND LEAVE THE AAW TO US
229 YOU'RE SO @!#$!NG STUPID YOU'RE A MENACE TO SOCIETY
230 THIS BASTARD HAS MORE DOWNING GRIPES THAN THE USS ARIZONA
231 COMMENTS AND RECOMMENDATIONS MY A$$
232 JUST OUT OF CURIOSITY GATOR, WHERE THE @!#$ ARE WE?
233 IT'S INTERVAL, AS FAR AS I'M CIRCUMCISED
269 EXCUSE ME SIR, BUT YOU OBVIOUSLY HAVE ME CONFUSED WITH SOMEBODY WHO GIVES A SH!T
500 THOSE @!#$!NG BLACK SHOE MUTHER FU_KERS
501 THOSE @!#$!NG REAR ECHELON MUTHER FU_KERS
600 THOSE @!#$!NG ASW PUKES
641 HANG IT IN YOUR @!#$!NG EAR
700 @!#$!NG GRUNTS
728 IF I HEAR "CV" CONCEPT ONE MORE TIME I'M GONNA PUKE
750 THAT FU_KER RUNS LIKE A WELL OILED MACHINE
775 YOUR OLD LADY WEARS COMBAT BOOTS
800 I LOVE THIS SO MUCH I CAN'T SH!T
901 IF IT'S SUCH A GOOD @!#$!NG DEAL, SEND ________
902 IF I CALLED FOR SH!T YOU'D COME SLIDING IN ON A SHOVEL
1000 COOL IT THE PADRE IS HERE
3000 HAY FOR THE HORSES, WHISKEY FOR MY MEN AND A PLATE OF FLIES FOR MY TOAD
3001 HE'S SO LIGHT HE'S A MENACE TO AVIATION
3002 HE JUST HAD HIS @!#$!NG TUBES CUT
3003 HE HASN'T HAD HIS LOBOTOMY YET
3031 NOT SO @!#$!NG FAST
Thanks, A4s!
But I'm sure you never had to use 142.
But I'm sure you never had to use 142.
5.5 in an H. Those seats suck.