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getting married
- Thread starter zarra182
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Better yet, be there to comfort his ex-wife.
AnnieQ, you underestimate Brett's knowledges. You should listen to him and apply those knowledges to your own marriage.
You obviously know how the guy's life works. :sleep_125
First off, my own marriage is quite fine thank you for your concern though.
And did he not propose to her? That obviously means he wants to spend the rest of his life with her, common sense...
You can't seriously believe that, can you?
HD,
There's a reason the older guys usually do the lecturing on this subject, and not people your or my age.
:icon_rage WTF else do guys propose for? Why don't you wait on belittling the love lives of others until you have some experience of your own.
Edit: Right on eddie.
I don't know what the post OCS leave policy is, or what the A-Pool wait is, but if you know you can take leave then and it is enough time, that would be good. The big problem is that you're switching commands and probably have no clue if you're going to wait for months or days. The reason I say you should take a holiday weekend in Primary is that you'll be able to get the request in pretty far in advance, and they'll probably be flexible with you if you aren't askign for much time AND you are NOT in ground school. Sims and flights they can work around, so make sure you aren't up for IFR or WX ground school or something.
If someone jumps off a 20 story building and manages to survive, would you recommend that others do the same? Look, everyone thinks they're in love and will be married forever. The fact of the matter is that more than 50% of those people will be divorced and the younger they are when they marry, the more likely a divorce. I'm not saying don't get married - I'm saying you should do so with full knowledges of the facts so you can make an informed decision. Going into it blindly, spouting such nonsense as "We love each other and we'll make it work," is just asking for trouble. Enjoy it while it lasts.
Brett
I am not recommending it to him, he is already engaged. Usually if you get engaged you plan a wedding and get married. The guy didn't ask if he should get married, he asked when he could plan a wedding. You are not going to change his mind with your comments, so how about you just answer his question or don't answer. I am the first to agree that he at least should be telling his future wife what to expect. It is definitely a tough and different kind of lifestyle. But there are many of us that do it.
:sleep_125
I'd avoid the situation to begin with.
So you're saying that the only reason people get married is for "true love"? I won't disagree that the majority people think that they are in love but if they all were, why do we have such a high divorce rate? People trick themselves into believing that Ms. Right-Now is Mrs. Right and get themselves into situations that they're not ready for.
Want a couple more reasons that don't necessarily involve "true love"? How about the guy that knocks up the girl and marries her? The couple that gets married for financial reasons? These don't involve true love, yet they still involve a proposal. You assume that all situations are going to match up to your idea of marriage and it doesn't work.
AngryMan said:
You don't know what experience I may or may not have at the ripe age of 20.
I normally say "Don't knock it 'til you try it" but I'll make an exception for marriage. @eddie: Some of those "older" folks that are defending marriage are only a year or two older than I am. You don't automatically gain wisdom when you slip that ring on your finger.
My roomate did it, and you'll be graduating about the same timeframe that we did last year (April). It shoudn't be a big problem. You'll learn more about it when you get to OCS, Walt the PSD guy will fill you in with all of the details.
I don't know any of the details myself, cause I zoned out on that part of the brief because it didn't apply to me. But you do/should have that 30 day option.
I don't know any of the details myself, cause I zoned out on that part of the brief because it didn't apply to me. But you do/should have that 30 day option.
Can we put some type of opening statement to the new airwarriors users...DO NOT ASK FOR MARITAL ADVICE.........PLEASE!!!!
Better yet, one that says DON'T GET MARRIED UNTIL AFTER YOUR FIRST DEPLOYMENT.
Seriously, people, what's the rush?Brett
I have never seen anyone ask for marital advice here. Most people, myself included, simply ask when they can get leave and everyone answers a diffferent question. By the time they're talking about the date on this forum, their mind is set, for better or worse. I think asking about leave dates is as legitimate as any other question that gets asked on here, so help them out.
Brett, It isn't for everyone, and not everyone is rushing it. I knew my wife for years and gave it plenty of thought. We could have waited longer, but I don't think it would have mattered, and I would have been a lot less happy during that time. If it ends up being a mistake, it will have been one worth making. Your advice has merit, because people should be cautious, but there are also great rewards.
Make your decision on the girl, not the timing. You could rush in or wait too long and end up marrying someone you don't need to accomodate your career or life goals, OR you could let your soul mate slip by because the timing is inconvenient.
Highdimension, you're really stretching it, and I don't think even you believe that this guy is in one of those situations. Stop playing know it all college boy.
Brett, It isn't for everyone, and not everyone is rushing it. I knew my wife for years and gave it plenty of thought. We could have waited longer, but I don't think it would have mattered, and I would have been a lot less happy during that time. If it ends up being a mistake, it will have been one worth making. Your advice has merit, because people should be cautious, but there are also great rewards.
Make your decision on the girl, not the timing. You could rush in or wait too long and end up marrying someone you don't need to accomodate your career or life goals, OR you could let your soul mate slip by because the timing is inconvenient.
Highdimension, you're really stretching it, and I don't think even you believe that this guy is in one of those situations. Stop playing know it all college boy.
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