Searching for a date to get married

[a_m]

Ok, that sounds reasonable. Is there anything else I should do?

 

[HH-60H]

Ok, that sounds reasonable. Is there anything else I should do?

Arguably, that is the most important thing to do. If something were to happen and she was not properly enrolled, it might jeopardize her coverage. That could be really bad.

Besides that..... Can't really think of anything Navy related.

 

[a_m]

On another note, how would having the actual wedding later be done? Would I have to apply for another license or whatnot if the actually ceremony would be in a different state?

 

[HeyJoe]

On another note, how would having the actual wedding later be done? Would I have to apply for another license or whatnot if the actually ceremony would be in a different state?

If you know where the ultimate ceremony will be and likely who will perform it, you work it out with whomever is to officiate. As some have noted, some religions are a bit more strict then others. Some make you go through premarital counseling. You can have ceremonies as much as you like (some people get "remarried" as part of recommitment, etc. after many years together) so that shouldn't be much of a worry as long as you are talking to right folks. I was in VB area and went to do JOP thing when my planned date got messed up because of early deployment. City gave me a license and used a local Reverend as the official so we went to his house and since church was next door, I called the squadron and had two JOPA (vice JOP) buds come over and draw swords in the chapel (3 of us khakis). That was on Friday afternoon and I was in a jet the next morning headed out of town. I got the wedding cake people to do a minature cake and got her in the system for benefits. Paid off well as in those days, bachelors got screwed halfway through cruise on BAQ.

 

[annaisdivine]

Just a thought: My mom went to a barbecue once where a couple had a surprise wedding. She said they were having a barbecue with all of their family and friends. Then the preacher showed up and the couple said "oh, by the way...we're getting married." Then they got married in their regular clothes. While I've never been married, a lot of my friends have been and from what I saw and what they told me, it seemed pretty stressful. I thought the barbecue sounded pretty cool because all you really have to worry about is if there's enough ketchup, charcoal, and beer. The thing that appealed to the couple was that there wasn't a whole bunch of staged stuff - just them in a natural setting on a regular day with the people that should be at their wedding: the ones that would show up at a barbecue - not some inflated guest list of people you would feel guilty about not inviting. And if the fancy wants to do the dress thing, tell her to get the dress and change into it when the preacher shows up.
Just a thought.

 

[HH-60H]

The thing that appealed to the couple was that there wasn't a whole bunch of staged stuff - just them in a natural setting on a regular day with the people that should be at their wedding: the ones that would show up at a barbecue - not some inflated guest list of people you would feel guilty about not inviting.

Sounds like a neat idea, but the only problem I see is someone special might not make the extra effort to attend since they don't know the event is actually a wedding.

 

[phrogpilot73]

On another note, how would having the actual wedding later be done? Would I have to apply for another license or whatnot if the actually ceremony would be in a different state?

Nope. You're already legally married. We didn't have to get a license in another state, and all we did was tell the minister that we were (and there was no need for him to sign a license) and we were off!

 

[Pags]

When Mrs. Pags and I got engaged, I knew I was leaving for 6mo in a few weeks and I wanted to make sure that she was going to be taken care of while I was gone. So, a few days later we went and got the JP marriage. The nice thing, is that she was now fully accepted into the wives club, had base access, and tricare. I knew that if anything came up, she could go the squadron and someone would be able to help her out ,which is a nice bit of peace of mind. Once the JP was done, we told everyone, that way we wouldn't have to play secret squirrel. Her family didn't quite understand at first, mine did (mom was a navy brat), but now they understand the upside of th JP. And of course, getting 6mo worth of family sep, married BAH, married car insurance rates, and not having to pay for her health care where all fringe benefits. When I got back from cruise, the squadron gave me plenty of time off for the wedding and honeymoon. Granted, I was a post cruise 2P who had nothing on the horizon and just about all of my quals done for HAC. We did the catholic wedding in another state and I don't think it involved anything extra, just the normal mountain of catholic pre-wedding paperwork and counseling.

 

[Schnugg]

When Mrs. Pags and I got engaged, I knew I was leaving for 6mo in a few weeks and I wanted to make sure that she was going to be taken care of while I was gone. So, a few days later we went and got the JP marriage. The nice thing, is that she was now fully accepted into the wives club, had base access, and tricare. I knew that if anything came up, she could go the squadron and someone would be able to help her out ,which is a nice bit of peace of mind. Once the JP was done, we told everyone, that way we wouldn't have to play secret squirrel. Her family didn't quite understand at first, mine did (mom was a navy brat), but now they understand the upside of th JP. And of course, getting 6mo worth of family sep, married BAH, married car insurance rates, and not having to pay for her health care where all fringe benefits. When I got back from cruise, the squadron gave me plenty of time off for the wedding and honeymoon. Granted, I was a post cruise 2P who had nothing on the horizon and just about all of my quals done for HAC. We did the catholic wedding in another state and I don't think it involved anything extra, just the normal mountain of catholic pre-wedding paperwork and counseling.

Exactly!!!

 

[HooverPilot]

Another vote for the JOP. I did it towards the end of flight school. After a long discussion with the preacher, he agreed to officiate the secret ceremony. Just remember that when you register the marriage at the courthouse to ask that they withold your name from the papers! My wife's Mom was local so the cat would have gotten out quick with that one. All said and done we were married, certified, registered, enrolled, ID'ed and signed up in a day.

We ended up having the big Church wedding the day after I was soft winged and was luck enough to have a 2 week wait for my winging so we escaped to Paris for a week! Good Luck!

 

[ChunksJR]

Ok, that sounds reasonable. Is there anything else I should do?

Besides call it off? I keed I keed....

 

[phrogpilot73]

Besides call it off? I keed I keed....

I think MB would have the same sentiment... Without kidding!

 

[annaisdivine]

Get married in Sri Lanka - its divorce rate is only 1.5%.

 

[helo_wifey]

Just remember that when you register the marriage at the courthouse to ask that they withold your name from the papers!

In San Diego County they no longer have this option. We signed up for it, but they said it wouldn't really do any good because someone could call and ask if we were married and they'd have to say yes or no. It was weird, but a good option if it's there.

Also, at least in SD County, we had to wait a week for the certificate and there was no rush delivery available. Just an FYI...

 

[a_m]

Ok, so if I do the JOP marriage, how would taxes work for my new wife if we are waiting for a regular wedding later in the year? How would the name change work?