Before I start this journey towards my dream of being an officer I just wanted to throw some questions out for current, former, and future officers alike.
Listening
Did you ever have any doubts about your ability to one day become an officer?
It took me 3 years and 4.5 apps in order to get into a commissioning source. It was never a matter of if, but when. Nothing wrong with having resolve, just don't get it confused with entitlement. When I first set out for a commissioning source, my attitude towards getting a commission was probably the only thing that made room for doubt, feelings of entitlement as opposed to feelings of resolve.
How did you overcome such doubts? When you first began your quest to become a Naval (or even Marine) Officer, what was your whole mindset towards the obstacles you had to overcome to get where you needed to be? I've tried to search such topics, but couldn't really scratch anything up.
Like I mentioned, I never had doubts about getting a commission, but looking back, my problem was my attitude made getting a commission doubtful.
My freshman year I felt entitled to get a commission and that was killing me in terms of ever earning it. Rather than sucking it up and working hard, I dodged a lot of the tasks feeling "
I just shouldn't have to". My freshman year GPA got trashed (2 Cs will do that to you) and I was a little flabbier too. It's ok to say "it's not a matter of if, but when" when you are actually putting out and busting your tail, that's resolve. But when you don't, you have entitlement issues. As a result, I was in no position to get a chance at a commission. But again, I felt the world owed me a commission, so what did I care? I kept trying regardless.
So how did I get over myself?
At the end of my craptacular freshman year of college I met up with a JROTC cadet I mentored who was about to graduate. Now, unlike me at the time, this cadet was the most hardworking, hardcharging person you'd ever see. In my opinion, she was the best the program had. However, she was medically disqualified from military service and would never be allowed to apply for commission. I had already knew that for a long time and mentored her into the unit's future XO anyway feeling the most I could do is make what little involvement in a military environment she'd have meaningful. She still looks up to me and even credited her making unit XO to everything I taught her about leadership. Despite my shortcomings, she viewed me as a hero. So with that said, how could I continue to make poor marks and sandbag Midshipman requirements when this cadet who would do anything to get a commission and was such a hardcharger can't even try? Who was I to have her say she owed everything she learned about leadership to me when I wasn't living up to that praise? The sense of entitlement crumbled away.
Enter my sophomore and junior years. From then on, I did a 180 virtually in everyway. People who know me personally will tell you. I worked 11x as hard to earn a commission. I lost about 50 pounds in a year alone, I raised my GPA back into the 3 range (3.7 currently), and eventually i joined airwarriors and got the real gouge on getting a commission. It still toke me another 2 years to get into an officer program, but when I thought of that young cadet's dedication to my abilities, the time seemed to fly by as a sense of resolve took over and I finally
earned Officer Candidacy.
So my advice to conquer doubt is for you to find your source of resolve and let that guide you through the moments you think you can't succeed (be it your ambitious, family, or a good friend).