Funeral Uniform?

[Purdue]

I've been invited to a funeral for a "friend-of-a-friend's" recently deceased infant.

The ceremony is this weekend, and I'm curious as to what uniform I should wear? Ceremony will be onbase... and the only funeral I went to in uniform I was told to be in SDB's (even hough it was summer).

So, is it appropriate to wear SDB's to this? Or should I bust out my dress (choker) whites? I'm not going to don the sword or anything, but any direction would help a lot. I have 24 hours to get my uniform in order...

And yes, before the flames start: I know this is a stupid question and I'm probably all screwed up... but I just don't want to take the chance and be wrong.

 

[Thisguy]

SDBs (ribbons, not medals) are authorized year round. But yeah, civvies are fine too.

As for chokers at a funeral, have you seen anyone in a white tux at a funeral before? There's your answer.

 

[TheBubba]

Concur with Rand on this one. Go in civvies. This isn't exactly an appropriate event to go to in chokers.

 

[Purdue]

Ok, Thanks for the quick responses. I was pretty sure SDB's was the answer... and I would go in civvies, but it's a serviceman's child, the ceremony is on NAS Pensacola, and ... I don't have anything of that caliber of dress that IS NOT a uniform... Figured I'd only be at P-cola for a few months, so I left most of my "better than khaki's and a polo - but not a Dress Uniform" clothing in storage.

SDB's it is then.

 

[A4sForever]

It's a civilian funeral --- not a military one. Unless, of course, the parents requested that military members wear the uniform.

It's usually the service dress uniform of the "season" ... check the POD.

And yes ... I have attended military funerals in choker whites.

 

[Lawman]

Ok, Thanks for the quick responses. I was pretty sure SDB's was the answer... and I would go in civvies, but it's a serviceman's child, the ceremony is on NAS Pensacola, and ... I don't have anything of that caliber of dress that IS NOT a uniform... Figured I'd only be at P-cola for a few months, so I left most of my "better than khaki's and a polo - but not a Dress Uniform" clothing in storage.

SDB's it is then.

You may find this as sounding a little bit like a prick however Id take this lesson as a good instance of why you need to have at least a couple outfits of a Civvy Nature that are this caliber. Seriously man, go get yourself a couple pairs of dress slacks and a couple button ups. Get yourself a pair of dress shoes that are not patent leather uniform issue. If you dont own a suit you really ought to. Yes I realize you spend all this umpteen piles of money on your uniforms why not wear them but there will come times when you just need to go some places and dress up without dressing military. Just a good thing to have "just in case."

 

[Brett327]

You may find this as sounding a little bit like a prick however Id take this lesson as a good instance of why you need to have at least a couple outfits of a Civvy Nature that are this caliber. Seriously man, go get yourself a couple pairs of dress slacks and a couple button ups. Get yourself a pair of dress shoes that are not patent leather uniform issue. If you dont own a suit you really ought to. Yes I realize you spend all this umpteen piles of money on your uniforms why not wear them but there will come times when you just need to go some places and dress up without dressing military. Just a god thing to have "just in case."

I second that. Run down to the Men's Wearhouse. We're not talking Armani here, but they can hook you up for not a lot of cash.

Brett

 

[zab1001]

By "friend of a friend" I'm going to assume you're dating someone who will be attending the funeral. Fair enough. For future reference, you were "asked to attend" the service, not "invited". It's not a cocktail party.

As far as civilian attire, go to Macys (or whatever big department store is in Pcola), sign up for a Visa, and get what you need. They should cut you some kind of deal for your first purchase.

I would not go in uniform.

 

[Steve Wilkins]

Never been to a funeral, so I'm not much help on this one. However, unless you know the parents personally and they want you in ANY uniform, I'd wear civies if I were you.

 

[nittany03]

Agreed with all that has been said. A good etiquette guideline is when you are NOT the center of attention (at someone else's wedding, funeral, graduation, etc.) don't show up in uniform unless specifically asked. You may not mean it to be this way but it just screams "hey, look at me," which is not the point of showing up.

 

[Catmando]

You have been given good advice, and valid reasoning. For this particular occasion, I too would choose appropriate civilian attire, above a uniform. (But if you do not have the "appropriate civilian attire," the uniform should be fine.)

Regardless of your attire, remember this:

There is no greater tragedy imaginable for any parent, than to lose a child. By your mere presence (not your attire), you honor the deceased, and give much needed comfort to pained and distressed parents. As a parent, I am sure they will focus on, and deeply appreciate your presence and solace, rather than your packaging.

 

[BlkPny]

Agree with all the advice, amd my compliments to you for having the class to ask the question in the first place. Go, honor the deceased, and comfort the parents.

 

[dnweinreb]

having never been to neither wedding nor funeral whilst in the navy I wonder if you all feel the same way about a wedding? It's not a somber event like a funeral so would it be considered hotdogging to show up in chokers? If I were going to do it I would do it as a sign of respect for the groom (he's military and she's not) but do you think it would be interpreted as me trying to steal thunder?

 

[GMan1976]

Agree with aforementioned. This also might be able to provide add'l info from Unif.Regs: NAVMEDCOMINST 5360.1 establishes burial uniform policy. For additional information on funerals contact the BUPERS Casualty Assistance Branch (Pers-621) at COM (901)874-4300 or DSN 882-4301. Not sure if this refers to burial "detail" or not, but can't hurt to ask...

 

[Lawman]

having never been to neither wedding nor funeral whilst in the navy I wonder if you all feel the same way about a wedding? It's not a somber event like a funeral so would it be considered hotdogging to show up in chokers? If I were going to do it I would do it as a sign of respect for the groom (he's military and she's not) but do you think it would be interpreted as me trying to steal thunder?

Well... Is the bride gonna wear white too? I mean your pretty much assured some attention from the brides mades. Just make sure that they are hot before you decide to go in something that attracts that kind of attention. Dont want to be the hottest guy at the party full of ugly girls, even with an open bar.