Alan,
I'll try to answer most of your questions:
I'm currently waiting on results from the Seaman to Admiral board that adjourned on the 28th of September. It is a enlisted commisioning program for those that don't have a degree yet. They send you off to school for up to three years, paying for all of your school expenses in addition to paying your current enlisted active duty pay, AND keeping you eligible for advancement. Once you get your degree you are commisioned as an ensign in the Navy Reserve (a kind of technicality for all new officers). Then you go off to your training for your particular designator, in my case it will (hopefully!) be SNA.
I swore the oath in Aug 98 on the basis of being a Nuke Bubblehead (submariner). But I was in the Delayed Entry Program and auditioned for the band (on trumpet) before I went off to Boot Camp. I was in the Seattle area at the time, where there is a band, so I auditioned there. I found out about a week later that I was accepted to the Navy music program if I wanted. It took me a while to decide because they throw A LOT of money at you to go Nuke. But I decided I'd rather be happy than rich and chose music.
In Boot Camp most musicians-to-be are in what they call a 900 division and play music while there. I didn't get to do that and was in what they call a rifle division (any other than 900). It was cool, though, I was RCPO (recruit chief petty officer) of my division and honor grad as well, and my RDC (recruit division commander) let me go and practice trumpet during service week.
After boot you go to "A" school which for musicians is the Armed Forces School of Music in Norfolk, Virginia:
https://www.cnet.navy.mil/som/
It's located on the Little Creek Amphib Base and trains sailors, soldiers, and marines. The Basic Music Course normally takes 6 months. When you get there you take an incoming audition on your instrument and theory test. I scored well enough on both of these to "Accel" out of the course. I was at the school for a little less than 2 months, which primarily consisted of waiting for orders to my band.
I was assigned to the U.S. Navy Showband which is in (suprise for me) Norfolk, Virginia!
http://www.atlanticfleet.navy.mil/band/
However, they are one of the few Navy Bands that goes underway. Specifically, the Showband goes on UNITAS, a collaborative deployment with several different countries' navies(sp?) throughout South America. It is designed to promote and foster understanding and cohesion between the various countries' naval forces. The band is basically the PR unit. We travel on the ships with the Task Force and play all the basic ceremonial functions, but then when we get in port we play for all the people of South America. I'm not joking when I say that I've had armed guards with M-16's holding back throngs of screaming women from getting to me and the rest of the band. It's like we were the frickin' Beatles!! To make a long story short, Showband and South America ru-u-u-u-u-le.
I had a two year assignment to the Showband, and then requested to go back to the School of Music for advanced courses. I went to the Unit Leader course from Jan 02 to Jun 02 graduating at the top of my class, and am now taking the Arranger course which I will complete in December. I now have orders to Italy (Sixth Fleet)
http://www.nsa.naples.navy.mil/c6fband.htm
but hopefully that will all change with me (hopefully!) getting accepted to the Seaman to Admiral program.
As far as bands are concerned, there are 12 "fleet" bands and 2 "premier" bands. Check out this web site for specifics:
http://www.bupers.navy.mil/navymusic/index.html
There are mainly three bands that will possibly deploy; all the rest are strictly shore duty. They are: the U.S Navy Showband, which is a part of the ATLANTIC Fleet Band; the SEVENTH Fleet Band, based in Yokosuka, Japan; and the SIXTH Fleet Band, based in Naples, Italy.
As far as being married and in the band, it's just like any other job as far as I know (aside from being in a band that gets deployed). I'm not married, but I know a lot of married people in the bands (in fact a lot of married coupled are BOTH in the band). If you need more info on that, talk to Gresh on this forum.
Hope this terribly long winded message helps you! E-mail me if you have more specific questions I can answer.
James