Surviving military aviation Chapter 1: What not to do

[zab1001]

Half right- there was no blaze

Edit: to clarify, a minute or two before the crash, the engine sputtered for a few moments and then quit.

Didn't they hit one of those big AC units? I vaguely remember going into Cordova Mall after the fact on a CCX and having one of my local student buds point out the replacement unit that was clearly new in comparison.

 

[Flash]

My T-2 partner decided to ride in the back of a T-39 for a x-country after getting soft-winged to get out of town for the weekend. The problem? He took his wife a along too. Apparently he got permission from someone in VT-86 ops and everything was good to go for them until the contract pilot complained to the CO. He never got winged. That wasn't the only hit against him but still felt bad for him, good guy even if he was a Marine, never knew anyone to get soft-winged then not get their real wings.

 

[phrogpilot73]

Late 1990s, a handful of training command butter bar types (not all of them current flight students at the time of the story; this detail is relevant) rent a pair of small airplanes in Pensacola for a "hundred dollar hamburger" on a Saturday night. So far, so good, and a pretty neat way to spend part of your weekend.

Well, the return trip ended quite spectacularly, with one of the airplanes crashing on the roof of the mall next to the airport. Local media reports remarked about what great luck that there were not only no major injuries but neither was there any post-crash fire. Now, aviation-savvy readers will tend to consider that last detail as having very little to do with "luck." The NTSB accident investigation shed much light on the mishap, but without completely giving away the conclusion, perhaps it is relevant to mention that the ill-fated pilot was an API attrite--going from memory although I'm pretty confident in the details--for some academic performance issues on the navigation exam(s).

I was just starting API as this happened... I wondered why I had to get detoured going to my apartment across from Cordova Mall... Very shortly, in true aviation fashion - the news clipping was seen hanging in MATSG-21 spaces with the quote "don't let this be your FAM-1." The back story is correct, he failed out of API for flight planning/navigation. I guess the nuances of having fuel plans escaped him... Never knew what happened to him...

Until I met PSW.

Turns out, he ended up as an Intelligence Officer in the USMC (irony is thick there), and was working with PSW in her command up at Fort Meade. PSW had a coworker tell her (in confidence) the story, which of course she told me (there are no secrets in marriage!). I have yet to let him know that I know what happened, and who he is, but I've tried to allude to it...

For the record, he's a good dude (got out, and went into the reserves as a civil affairs guy, and has deployed his balls off to both Iraq and Afghanistan) just lacking the social skills (and fuel planning) of an aviator. Social skills you say? He was over our house for dinner, with his girlfriend, and PSW dropped something, bent over to pick it up and he said "I like that view." "DUDE, that's my wife!"

EDIT - PSW just reminded me that after I said "DUDE, that's my wife!" We had to follow it up with "DUDE, that's my midshipman!" (we were sponsoring mids at the time). Like I said, no social skills...

 

[Gatordev]

One of the people in the back seat (I believe she was in A-Pool at the time) went on to fly helos, instructed in the VTs and then went Coast Guard (at the VTs, the last time I saw her), so not everyone was a soup sandwich in the plane.

Still, out of gas right AT the airport? That's the part of the story that never quite made sense to me.

 

[phrogpilot73]

Still, out of gas right AT the airport? That's the part of the story that never quite made sense to me.

From what I understand, it was a wet rental - and he never actually preflighted to make sure he was getting full bags... They only headed to Mobile and back (no prob if they were at full bags, hence the reason the other A/C made it to P-Cola regional just fine), but he wasn't at full bags...

 

[Reconjoe]

I for one would like to hear more about this new CVW5 student and the case of the mysterious turd...

 

[AUtiger]

Knowing this new addition to Japan, I'm picturing something along the lines of Tucker Max and Embassy Suites but with a flight suit and Base Ops....

 

[CommodoreMid]

I for one would like to hear more about this new CVW5 student and the case of the mysterious turd...

Ditto.

 

[C420sailor]

Word on the street is that it was the last day of fighter det in Key West, and some of the CAT 1's were still intoxicated from the night before. While they were waiting in base ops for their C-40 to arrive, two guys went into the bathroom to adjust gross weight. Battleshits ensued, and one aviator attempted to snap a cell phone pic of his masterpiece to send to his buddy in the adjacent stall. Unfortunately for him, there was a round still in the chamber when he went to snap the pic...

 

[bluesig1]

Just imagine the puzzled look of the OIC, when he has to track down a random floor shitter. "Seriously, which one of you shit on the floor?"

 

[KCOTT]

this thread is awesome

 

[blackbart22]

We had a phantom sheeter on the Connie who targeted fuel stations and then called the bridge to report his deed. The V-4 CWO was about 6'3" and built like a tank. He stood up at all hands quarters and said "The next time this happens we will catch the perpetrator and I will make him eat it and I can do that!" It never happened again. That was in the sixties. Don't know if he could take that approach today.

 

[zab1001]

You can shit on the door of your DH's house upon check-in to a squadron and still progress nicely as an aviator.

I know a guy who did the same thing to a DH, but in a BOQ. The maid found it first, hilarity did not ensue.

 

[phrogpilot73]

I know a guy who did the same thing to a DH, but in a BOQ. The maid found it first, hilarity did not ensue.

I shit in the bushes outside the BOQ in Yuma, because after the Tandoori - I wasn't going to make it to ANY room in time... And I survived...

 

[MasterBates]

I may have upper decked a rival squadrons toilets. All of them.

The joys of being the Bull Ensign in an aviation squadron.