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New Member
I am currently a Plebe at USNA. It took me a while to get here. Out of high school, I was motivated to go, but got denied and went to NROTC at a great engineering school. Long story short, I met my really amazing girlfriend and I was content with the school and NROTC, where I was doing well. But I still had a desire to go to USNA even though I knew I had a good gig. At the time, I didn't mind spending that extra year to retake many of the same classes and repeat a 4/C year. I said what the heck, and reapplied to see if I would get in. And I did. I was faced with a hard decision of leaving my school and NROTC program and primarily my girlfriend or staying to give up a dream. Well, I choose what my older self would tell my younger self. I didn't want to make a decision primarily based on a girl. After all, I could have stayed for her and then it might not have worked out, and then I would have regretted staying. Or I could stay and possibly have it work out but regret leaving her. Presently, we are still together, but we have really tough days sometimes.

Fast forward through an emotionally brutal summer and I still cannot find out why I thought it was worth it to leave. I disconnected our relationship and put us through turmoil just because I wanted USNA. Well, I have been here for a while, and to be honest, it is not what I thought it would be like. Maybe it is, but the decision I made has clouded my thoughts. People ask me how I had the guts to leave, and that they would have stayed. My SO and I go through emotional times, and we still want each other. And I wake up everyday feeling bad about what I did, and the life I walked away from.

My question is, is this place worth it over NROTC? Was my decision rash? My NROTC company officers didn't have nice things to say about my decision of leaving. The bottom line is that I cannot go back, I would never get another scholarship, and frankly, I still don't think I would give up this place even though I have not found out why I wanted it yet. Sure there are great opportunities here, and we do cool things, but is that worth it over my quality of life? There is a very negative atmosphere here at times... Some people say they wish they went to ROTC, and others see their friends at civilian schools and wish they would have done that also. Meanwhile, I see my friends at my old school doing ROTC and living a civilian life, and at the end of the day, they will end up in the same place that I am.

I want to be a Naval Aviator... It is something I have wanted since I was young. I just need help finding out why giving up everything to go this route was worth it.


Well-Known Member
You want to be a Naval Aviator yes? If so then stay and tough it out.

The odds of you ending up with that girl even if you stayed at NROTC were probably slim anyway, if she stays great, if not it will feel like you someone kicked you in the gut and pissed on your face, but you will get over it if that happens.

I do hope everything works out great, just remember life in general is full of hard choices and often shitty circumstances, press on and do great things.

Hopeful Hoya

Well-Known Member
Yeah I know how shitty it is. But just know that USNA or NROTC is just the beginning, and even in flight school you're not going to have a lot of time to sustain a long distance relationship. I went through something similar so if you want to talk feel free to shoot me a PM.

Don't lose sight of what the ultimate goal is. As one of my instructors said during API, you can get a much hotter GF or BF after you're wearing gold wings on your chest anyways. ;)


Land of the rising sun. Literally. There's no DST!
1. You haven't been at USNA for a long time. You've been there approximately 8 weeks out of 47-ish months. Don't make a rash decision on what you experienced during Plebe Summer and what, 1 week of the Academic year?
2. You don't even know what opportunities you have at USNA yet, and every year they add more. There are study abroad opportunities. You get twice as much summer training, which will make you feel confident you can con a vessel, or sail a boat, or interact with a foreign military, or work at the Office of Naval Intelligence or something that none of your peers in the civilian world or NROTC will get. As a result, you will get far more comfortable as to how to work with Lieutenants through Commanders and be more prepared when you hit the fleet than your peers in that respect. You'll understand expectations.
3. You (should) build a life-long routine for fitness at USNA and they will give you the tools to build that.
4. You're what? 19? 20 maybe? You don't know what you want with women yet, believe me.
5. If she's having a rough time while you're at USNA: she won't make it through a deployment.
6. USNA has its downsides, but that doesn't mean it's filled with negativity. I remember getting jealous every year at Halloween seeing all my friends have parties with girls in just ridiculous outfits that were really lingerie, meanwhile, as a plebe, I was passing out candy to people I considered my near torturers while trying to get schoolwork done and memorizing what breakfast, lunch, and dinner were the following day. But then on summer YP cruise, being in NYC in whites, two outrageously hot Norweigan massage artists came up to me, wanted to hang out and a limo driver gave me a discount and gave me his services for the entire evening. Then when they wanted to see Grand Central at 3 in the morning and it was closed, the cop guarding it let me in with these two hot women by ourselves under the condition we didn't touch anything. I wasn't jealous of their Halloweens anymore.
7. Plebe year is tough. Get over it. You made a decision, live with the consequences.
8. Unless you were at an Ivy League school, chances are USNA has more "name-brand" national recognition than whatever school you were at that, albeit good, has a concentrated network only in the region it's located in. I didn't think this was true until I started applying for grad schools and of the ones I've applied to, they've all been impressed I was a USNA grad.
9. Get back to studying. You're a plebe. You don't have time to be on AW and to be bitching and moaning!


New Member
I just need help finding out why giving up everything to go this route was worth it.
Ehhhh.... I also went to normal college for a year, then decided to go to USNA. I'm currently in flight school aaand to be honest, it probably wasn't worth it to switch to USNA. So yeah, you're gonna have to harden up and accept the fact that you screwed yourself. Do something badass, like use the government's money to pay for a semester at a civilian school abroad.

Or, if you can somehow switch back to ROTC or get an aviation contract through OCS or something of the sort... well I don't really see why that's a bad idea.


Making Recruiting Great Again
Or, if you can somehow switch back to ROTC or get an aviation contract through OCS or something of the sort... well I don't really see why that's a bad idea.
That's risky at best. Assuming he drops and submits an OCS package he will need to explain why he turned down an officer commission through USNA. Simply saying, "I wanted a real college experience" won't cut it.


Livin' On the Right Side of the River From Pags!
Look on the bright side. You don't have to put up with lame "safe spaces" and "trigger warnings." You have remarkable options, will make friends that will last for the rest of your life and get a big ass ring at the far end. You have hit a win on life's lottery - stop whining and get on with it.


Working Class Bum
Super Moderator
With the Naval Academy's acceptance rate of 8.5%, just know that if you quit, there are 14,910 other people that wanted your spot.

As others have said, weather the storm...you'll survive. As for the SO, you will both either make it work, or it won't. If it doesn't work, there are plenty of fish in the sea. Press on.