Navy vs. McDonalds

[Pags]

27 reasons why McDonald's is better than the Navy

> 1. If you have to take a piss, you can go take a piss. No questions
> asked.
> 2. You'll never have to go port and starboard on the fryer.
> 3. Better pay.
> 4. The ability to quit!
> 5. McDonald's doesn't deploy.
> 6. They have actual janitors.
> 7. No McDrills.
> 8. The grill breaks....You CALL someone to fix it.
> 9. No time at McDonald's will you hear your boss give a 30 minute
> dissertation over the P.A. on the importance of being at the register 15
minutes early.
> 10. McDonald's will eventually fire the ***REALLY*** stupid employees.
> 11. If McDonald's catches fire, you leave.
> 12. Someone else makes the water.
> 13. Personnel inspection requirements are written on the door. (no shirt, no shoes, no service)
> 14. At McDonald's, dislocating your shoulder is not considered getting the "good deal"
> 15. If you want to buy your boss a beer, thats okay.
> 16. If you want to tell your boss to "**** off and just die, just ****ing
die" that's okay too.
> 17. Ther is no Uniform Code of McDonald's Justice to deal with.
> 18. No one will wake you at 2 in the morning to start the grill.
> 19. Chances of you getting called back after you get off work are pretty
damn slim.
> 20. $2.99 is a meal price, not a daily wage at McDonalds
> 21. You don't have to go single register operations if someone spills a
Coke.
> 22. McDonald's doesn't require a 24 hour Shutdown Register Operator and a McRoving Watch.
> 23. You don't have to come in to work at 7am only to wait around for an
> hour for your boss to tell you things you already knew.
> 24. If you burn a hamburger, they won't take away half a month's pay for
> two months and restrict you to the playground.
> 25. You don't have to take apart the shake machine once a quarter, JUST BECAUSE.
> 26. You scrub the floors because it's dirty, not because it's Wednesday.
> 27. ALL of the articles of the Constitution apply to you at McDonald's

 

[KBayDog]

28. No nine months of "stashed" time waiting to begin your McTraining

 

[Road Program]

29. No McDuty
30. You will never hear "Ding ding...ding ding...MacDonald's...Arriving."
31. You don't get graded by another grill cook every time you cook a burger.

Of course, if you work at MacDonald's, you don't get to wear a McFlightsuit.

 

[VarmintShooter]

32. No filling out an McORM worksheet every time your shift ends.
33. A "High Risk Activity" would be eating the food you just cooked, not something you are prohibited from doing.
34. Every day can be a beer day - it's up to you to make it happen.

Hmmm, but on the flip side ... no McWings (well, not the kind you should pin on your chest anyway), not sure how much job satisfaction you derive from being named fry cook of the year, no Thailand, and they have yet to cast Tom Cruise as the cool McBurger cooker who gets all the hot chicks.

I'm Lovin' It ...

 

[E5B]

35. Using a "any McMouse" form because someone didn't get a "time-hack" before going on break.

36. When you turn 25, 30 and 35, you don't have to get a long McPhysical and get all kinds of blood drawn and get Mr Winky checked out.

 

[KBayDog]

37. The odds of getting transferred to another McDonalds are pretty slim.
38. Hot Cakes, not Hot Racks.
39. 3:00am is when you are closing shop, not opening up.
40. McDonalds doesn't hire more employees than it actually needs.
41. Employees need not worry about losing their jobs every four years.
42. When it IS time to scrub the floors, they actually provide you with the materials to do it.
43. The Village People haven't made a song about you.
44. They actually ISSUE you uniforms, and do not require you to buy new ones when they change them every few years.
45. There is no McRealignment and Closure.
46. America loves you all the time, not just when it's chic.
47. Foreigners view you as a valuable service, not as an occupying force.