Let me tell you first, that deployments in themselves do not cause a marriage to end in divorce. There are lots of factors and I am sure, yes, that there have been divorce papers served while on deploynment, but I am 100% sure that there are other factors coming into that. So, don't assume that just because you deploy that divorce stats go up.
Now, here is my take on this, my take and only my take. Every one has their own view and this is mine. I, in no way, am saying that a woman "lose herself" because of what her husband does or become a baby making machine, everyone has their own way of being a wife, but this is mine. I am what I consider old fashioned, I believe in being the best wife I can be so that my husband can attain all of his goals. For me, this meant leaving college 15 credits short of a Broadcasting Journalism and English degree so that he could become a Naval Aviator. I was on board with him 100%, this was his dream/goal, which when you are married also becomes your spouses dreams and goals. I wanted him to be happy. I want a husband to come home at the end of the day who has a fulfilling job and be happy than a husband who is doing something "menial" because I, as his wife, did not want to leave and move around. I knew what the lifestyle was going to be like.
I always knew that I would get married, have babies and stay home with them and keep the home while my husband worked. (Regardless of his job where ever it took him.) He signed up for the BDCP 1 month before we were married so I have been with him from the beginning of it all. I knew going in that he was going to be gone alot. He missed the birth of our first baby and then made it in for 3 days for the 2nd baby's birth while on a 6 month TDY. We've moved 5 or 6 times, I can't even remember the exact number anymore. LOL! Missed several birthday's, anniversaries, holidays, etc. Is it worthwhile? For my family and I, yes.
Bottom line for me: I am fine not working because I am taking care of our children at home while he is flying. I knew I was not going to work out of the home once we had children, so finding a job every time we moved was a null issue for me. Deployments and long TDY's suck, but it's part of his job and you learn to deal. Is it always butterflies and pansies?...uh, no. Do I get frustrated when he is gone? Yep. Do I deal? Yes. Mainly and most importantly: Is my husband happy? Yes.
You need to tell whatever woman you date what you plan to be. You will know if she stays that she is the type to handle the lifestyle. If not, good riddens then rather than later.
Hope this helps!
