Thanks for the responses. Some of my non-program questions are:
How are the schools (Elementary and High) up there?
How is base housing compared to houses out in town?
What are the areas to NOT to live in.
Does Monterrey have a small town feel (like Coronado) or a city feel?
How far is base housing from NPS?
My kids aren't school age but people recommend Pacific Grove/Carmel schools. Monterey city are not recommended, but there is a charter school that is supposed to be amazing. The elementary in La Mesa housing is supposed to be good as well. Not sure on the high schools but I'm guessing the PG/Carmel are better.
We live out in town, but we've lived in base housing twice and didn't like it. There are two communities, Ft Ord (about 15ish min from NPS in Seaside) and La Mesa (about 5ish min to NPS). Rentals can be smaller and potentially outdated as many of the homes are older but lots of character. People who live in PG say they love it, close to the ocean with the potential for good views. If you're wanting/needing a huge house (1800sqft +) here you're going to have to look hard and potentially pay more than BAH. Husband is hopefully promoting to O-4 next month, but as an O-3 we would have only gotten a duplex on La Mesa. It's hard to justify all the BAH for a duplex and shared utilities (they're averaged between residents if I understand correctly). We live 5 min from NPS in Monterey in an 1800sqft semi updated 3/2. We pay O-4 BAH but were fairly sure he would promote. Long time friends that were here for DLI are O-5 and have an amazing home with views. Off base housing you just have to be a little more patient, and ready to act quickly as good rentals go fast. You just don't want to live in Salinas, but Monterey, Carmel, Carmel Valley, PG, Pebble Beach, Seaside and Marina are all acceptable but as stated above for schools.
I've never lived on Coronado, we've only been in Jax otherwise our other 2 duty stations were overseas. To me, it feels like a city, but not like the general San Diego bigness (if that makes sense). But, I go to the farmers market every Friday and my regular vendors remember me now.
I also hated Guam, I'm not a beach goer and I hate hot weather. I love Monterey but I knew I would, I went to college in LA and took many trips up here. Guam was beautiful but I'll take pine trees over palm any day.
Hope that helps!