US War on Terrorism and Operational Review of Assets: (Snake Model)
VF / VFA Pilot: Duck tapes snake to F-18 wing tip and engages Aggressor Flights at Fallon, NV in advanced air-to-air while dreaming of being in Ass-Crack-Istan (Afghanistan) or Iraq and launches snake only to have snake get chopped up in T-34 prop from range spotter.
Airborne: Engages militant snake pockets in the mountains, kills snake, skins snake and saves snake skins as war trophies.
API Student: Meets militant female snakes in Pensacola, gets drunk and impresses militant female snake with big gold “Butter bars”.
Senate Foreign Relations Community: Holds hearings of possible incursion into militant snake’s areas, asks lots of questions to hear themselves talk, decides militant snake has human snake rights and leaves anti-snake operation resolution for another day and jumps into bed with a corporate CEO.
Naval Boot Camp Recruit: Has no idea there are militant snakes due to being in another universe.
OCS Candidate: Can’t wait to join war on militant snakes, but has a DI up their A*S.
Marines: Does massive unload of forces after no amphibious landing is possible, conducts massive ground ordinance strikes with ground force engagements. Kills all snakes, buildings, roads, rocks, and all 3 bushes in the country.
Army: Conducts large scale force build up around snake, calls in Navy and Air Force for large scale air strikes, realizes there are no more snakes to kill and begins picking nose.
Air Force: Is excited just to be doing anti-snake air operations, normally the Navy gets it all!
Navy: Deploys multiple Carrier Battle Groups into gulf, launches massive air strikes & cruise missile strikes into snake held areas. Informs National Security Council anti-snake operations are a resounding success and smiles as they fly over old anti snake held areas for the cameras and CNN.
API (now Primary Student) Part II: Has militant female snake in Pensacola obsessed with them and is conducting high intensity marriage operations against Student pilot.
OCS DI: “ON YOUR FACE WORM!”
Flight Line Security Watch (0200-0800): See’s truck approaching the flight line gate quickly! Try’s to yell for it to stop and see’s militant snake driving quickly by! Throws Log Book at speeding truck then realizes he can’t Log in militant snake’s unauthorized entry into flight line due to lost log book, looks for Base Security’s phone number, but realizes again, emergency phone number was in said lost Log Book, decides to take late night nap.
Squadron Maintenance Supply PO: “Ya, I’ll get that ordered.” Goes back to the Internet chat room.
CVN “Skipper” (Going on 53 days straight at sea): “Ehhh, good morning crew of the (YOUR SHIP HERE). Just wanna let ya know your doing an excellent job on the war against terrorism. Your command staff has decided we’re gonna cancel our next four ports so we can … ehhh .. stay out here and continue the fight. But umm… wanted to let ya know your doing a good job and ehhh …. Keep it up. Skipper out.”
To be continued …
VF / VFA Pilot: Duck tapes snake to F-18 wing tip and engages Aggressor Flights at Fallon, NV in advanced air-to-air while dreaming of being in Ass-Crack-Istan (Afghanistan) or Iraq and launches snake only to have snake get chopped up in T-34 prop from range spotter.
Airborne: Engages militant snake pockets in the mountains, kills snake, skins snake and saves snake skins as war trophies.
API Student: Meets militant female snakes in Pensacola, gets drunk and impresses militant female snake with big gold “Butter bars”.
Senate Foreign Relations Community: Holds hearings of possible incursion into militant snake’s areas, asks lots of questions to hear themselves talk, decides militant snake has human snake rights and leaves anti-snake operation resolution for another day and jumps into bed with a corporate CEO.
Naval Boot Camp Recruit: Has no idea there are militant snakes due to being in another universe.
OCS Candidate: Can’t wait to join war on militant snakes, but has a DI up their A*S.
Marines: Does massive unload of forces after no amphibious landing is possible, conducts massive ground ordinance strikes with ground force engagements. Kills all snakes, buildings, roads, rocks, and all 3 bushes in the country.
Army: Conducts large scale force build up around snake, calls in Navy and Air Force for large scale air strikes, realizes there are no more snakes to kill and begins picking nose.
Air Force: Is excited just to be doing anti-snake air operations, normally the Navy gets it all!
Navy: Deploys multiple Carrier Battle Groups into gulf, launches massive air strikes & cruise missile strikes into snake held areas. Informs National Security Council anti-snake operations are a resounding success and smiles as they fly over old anti snake held areas for the cameras and CNN.
API (now Primary Student) Part II: Has militant female snake in Pensacola obsessed with them and is conducting high intensity marriage operations against Student pilot.
OCS DI: “ON YOUR FACE WORM!”
Flight Line Security Watch (0200-0800): See’s truck approaching the flight line gate quickly! Try’s to yell for it to stop and see’s militant snake driving quickly by! Throws Log Book at speeding truck then realizes he can’t Log in militant snake’s unauthorized entry into flight line due to lost log book, looks for Base Security’s phone number, but realizes again, emergency phone number was in said lost Log Book, decides to take late night nap.
Squadron Maintenance Supply PO: “Ya, I’ll get that ordered.” Goes back to the Internet chat room.
CVN “Skipper” (Going on 53 days straight at sea): “Ehhh, good morning crew of the (YOUR SHIP HERE). Just wanna let ya know your doing an excellent job on the war against terrorism. Your command staff has decided we’re gonna cancel our next four ports so we can … ehhh .. stay out here and continue the fight. But umm… wanted to let ya know your doing a good job and ehhh …. Keep it up. Skipper out.”
To be continued …