For the Norfolk Area:
Eagle Haven at NAB LC (or JEBLCFS if you will) is one of the best military courses I've played, and I played there all the time when the family lived in Ocean View. Lots of awesome views and hole designs.
I've only played Sewell's point once, but it's a solid track. Can't speak to Oceana's courses as I haven't played them.
I agree with
@SlickAg that VA Beach National is the best course in the area. Originally was gonna be apart of the TPC program as TPC VA Beach. Beautiful track with the best conditions in the area. Australian pro Marc Leishman own a house out there.
Signature at Westneck is another good track, but a few years ago some kind of bacteria got into the greens and killed them. No idea how they're doing these days.
The public courses out there aren't bad either. I played Red Wing Lake twice and thought it was good. I'd say the condition there is a little better than Kempsville, where they play the City Amateur tournament (not to be confused with Kingsmill, which I regret not getting out to). Lambert's Point is only a nine hole par 34, but it a cool links style course.
/Edit:
San Diego:
NASNI's course, Sea N' Air is awesome and the back nine runs right along Breaker's beach. It's always green out there and while it's on the shorter side, can't beat the deal. Admiral Baker North is also a good course, but it's open to the public now so it's always packed. It's tougher than Sea N' Air and would still suggest it. Baker South is short and the condition has continued to deteriorate over the years.
The Pendelton golf course on the south side of the base is also a good track.
Get a Resident's card which gets you the resident rate at Balboa, Mission Bay, and Torrey. If you play Torrey, this saves you about $200.
Balboa is a cool experience, but I personally hate the course. The greens are nice, but the green complexes were designed 70 years ago when greens were more comparable to carpet, so now that they run faster some of them are impossible to putt. You do get some nice views of Downtown San Diego though.
I love both courses at Torrey, both of which are used for the Farmer's Insurance Open (PGA Event). The South hosted the U.S Open in 2008, and will host the U.S Open next year in 2021.
Lot's of other great golf in the Escondido/North County/San Marcos/Carlsbad area as well.