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Why did the chicken cross the road?

nittany03

Recovering NFO. Herder of Programmers.
pilot
None
Super Moderator
Contributor
CNATRA: The purpose is to familiarize the chicken with road-crossing procedures. Road-crossing should be performed only between the hours of sunrise and sunset. Solo chickens must have at least three miles of visibility and a safety observer.

BUPERS: Due to the needs of the Navy, the chicken was involuntarily reassigned to the other side of the road. This will be a 3-year unaccompanied tour, but we promise to give the chicken a good-deal assignment afterwards. Every chicken will be required to do one road-crossing during its career, and we promise that this will not affect its opportunities for future promotion. Really. We promise. Pinky swear.

USNTPS: This event will need confirmation; we need to repeat it using varied chicken breeds, road types, and weather conditions to confirm whether it can actually happen within the parameters specified for chickens, and the remote possibility that they might cross thruways designated by some as "roads."

NAVCENT: The purpose is not important. What is important is that the chicken remained under the OPCON of 5th Fleet and did not chop to the theater on the other side of the road. Without chopping, the chicken was able to achieve a seamless road-crossing with near perfect, real-time in-transit visibility.

ONI: What chicken?

Naval Safety Center: The chicken was instructed to hold short of the road. This road incursion incident was reported in a Hazardous Chicken Road-Crossing Report (HCRCR). Safety Os, please re-emphasize at your next AOM that chickens are required to read back all hold short instructions.

SPAWAR: The "stovepipe" chickens of today will be replaced with a multi-function, supported, affordable, integrated and interoperable world-class chicken, enabling the warfighter to dominate the roads of today and tomorrow, as we "Pivot to the Pacific." Comptroller holds and corporate taxes, however, will delay fielding for two years, unless additional funding is approved by Congress.

NAVAIR Chicken Systems Program Office (PMC 400): In a partnering relationship with the client, helped the chicken by rethinking its physical distribution strategy and implementation processes. The CSPO helped the chicken change to continue meeting its mission. However, the actual crossing of the road has not occurred due to the number of action items still open from the meeting.
 

LFCFan

*Insert nerd wings here*
TOPGUN: Once the Chicken crosses the road, we will send him back to the original side with a special patch so he can train other chickens to cross the road.

10th Fleet: The chicken was at a computer, but we swear this is the same thing as crossing the road
 
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BusyBee604

St. Francis/Hugh Hefner Combo!
pilot
Super Moderator
Contributor
Feathered Fowl NATOPS Rev. 27 of 02JUN2014

1. Initial day Road Crossing Qualifications (RCQs), require a minimum of 100 successful crossings in the Day Road Crossing Trainer (DRCT), with a minimum cumulative grade of 3.5.

2. Prior to attempting a night road crossing; nugget Chickens shall be complrtely day RT ROAD CROSSING qualified by the Road Crossing Signals Rooster (RCSR). Additionally, 100 hundred simulated crossings must be completed in the Night Road Crossing Trainer (NRCT), with no less than a 3,70 assigned by the observing RCSR, prior to the first night crossing attempt.

3. Two "touch the tar and returns" will be completed prior to the first full road crossing is executed. Hopefully, the trainee chicken will NOT also be executed during these attempts. If Rooster/Hen is executed during any practice, or full crossing attempt; refer to Bingo procedure in Para. 4.

4. Bingo information such as minimum Bingo feed state & bearing/direction to the nearest Foster Farms processing plant, in the event of an unsuccessful crossing; will be provided at the brief, prior to leaving the Ready Coop.:eek:
1- Rooster.png
BzB
 

nittany03

Recovering NFO. Herder of Programmers.
pilot
None
Super Moderator
Contributor
CV Air Ops: All chickens are responsible for reviewing the appropriate pubs, deconflicting their groundspace, and checking in on appropriate controlling frequencies. No, the road wasn't marked on the hot sheet, but the hot sheet is clearly marked "NOT FOR NAVIGATIONAL USE." If your squadron's chicken went Hot Dog Road, it's not our fault, sir.
 
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