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Motivational Statement Help

eholmes94

Member
I need some feedback about my motivational statement from people who have actually written one before. Thank you in advance for the help.


If you could have any superpower, what would it be?
Everyone has answered this question and, for my entire life, I've always had the same answer: to fly. Becoming a pilot for the United States Navy is a dream that I am determined to accomplish, regardless of the impending obstacles required to achieve it.

I served as the drum major of my high school marching band for two of the four years I participated and I loved it. I was held accountable for the behavior and performance of 67 people on and off the field, including myself. My time as a drum major taught me the importance of earning respect rather than demanding it by being respectful of those in my command and those who were my superior. I strongly believed that being a leader meant being the example of what I expected from others, giving me the chance to be a role model and not just a person in authority. As a result, the band worked harder and more joyously together, which gave me an immense sense of pleasure and pride.

As an intern for the Video Production Center for the past three years, I handled the planning, execution and aftermath of recording and live streaming numerous events on campus. Due to the nature of these live events, I've become confident in my ability to work in a stressful, real-time context. I've also had the opportunity to train and develop the skills of new students who took an interest in broadcasting. It was a joy to be able to take the skills that I had so meticulously learned and pass them onto someone else, who could potentially utilize them for even greater accomplishments than I had achieved.

For three and a half years, I've had the privilege of traveling with Kingdom Players, a selective recruiting and drama ministry team for Lee. In that time, I've represented Lee in 21 different states, Southeast Asia and in front of thousands of people. My time with KP has finely tuned my communication and public speaking skills, taught me the importance of adaptability and allowed me to be a leader in a fast paced, stressful environment.

As a student, I’ve learned to balance school, two jobs and my extracurricular activities and how to maintain excellence in each of these. Being eight hours from home has also given me the opportunity to become independent and develop my own sense of individuality and responsibility.

It is because of these experiences that I know I will be an asset to both the Naval and Aviation community as a Naval Officer. The lessons that I've learned about integrity, dependability, adaptability and diligence are what I hope to apply to my duties as an officer. Likewise, the lessons that I've learned about communication, patience, motivation and compassion are what I hope to apply to my duties as a leader.
 
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