Authentic Dialogue Help... for once, please?

[mverta]

Hello, everyone -

In addition to lifelong admiration and respect for military aviation, I've actually come here today to seek some help with an independent film I'm the post-production supervisor on. It's an "alien attack" movie, which features scenes of pilots investigating alien motherships, and engaging in combat with alien fighters.

Nobody up the chain cares if the dialogue is accurate, or even attempting to be. But I do. I cringe every time it feels in a movie like a pilot just grabbed the keys and took the jet to the store, casually bantering with people as he goes. Whenever I've heard snippets of actual combat communication, it is both real, and insanely intense.

If there's anyone here who would be willing to offer some advice on protocol and terminology - what would people really say and do during the various beat points - I would be so grateful. It may be a made-up scenario, but if it was real, there are just some things you'd do, and... well let's get it right for once, I say.

Thank you!

_Mike

 

[Hair Warrior]

Have you searched youtube?

- from 1989. You may find something newer.

 

[mverta]

Yes, I have, and have seen that footage as well, but thank you! The issue is that no real combat scenario matches the specific plot and beat points of our story. While between this clip and reading protocol manuals one can glean a few things, but it's really not the same. Ideally, I would love to be able to describe what actually happens in the scenes, and learn, "Okay, we'd say this then, and we'd do this then," etc.

 

[Uncle Fester]

Well, I've seen maybe a handful of movies where the pilots actually do briefs and checklists. Yeah, they're not exciting, but any professional aviation concern - private, government, military - the crew is reading off checklists and challenge-and-reply type stuff to each other constantly. We practice this stuff and do it so much and train so much that it's mostly muscle memory and familiarity.

My only gripe about The Martian, for example - otherwise one of my favorite movies ever - is at no point do the astronauts sound like they've done what real astronauts do, which is rehearse procedures over and over and over again, until they're spouting the procedures to each other like they have it written on their eyelids. Instead their dialogue is stuff like "Commander, do we launch?" Compare with From the Earth to the Moon or Apollo 13.

The only recent movie I can think of that did anything like this is Behind Enemy Lines, which though it was cheesy and unrealistic as hell for most of its run time, at least had the pilot and Hansel the WSO rolleyes running through an engine start check at the beginning of the movie when their alert launch gets called away.

I recall once a movie type saying that they tried to get military details right even if it wasn't essential to the plot - said something like, maybe most people won't know the difference, but for the people who will, they'll notice and appreciate it.

 

[mverta]

My main responsibility is serving the drama; it's not a documentary, so strictly speaking, it isn't essential to capture the reality of this. But the rub here is that I believe the legitimacy actually DOES impact, positively, the drama in this case - and for many of the reasons you mention. When pilots engage in practiced, efficient brevity code, they're communicating to an audience all sorts of things about their competency, their emotional state, etc. We can tell by the cadence what's going on with them - in contrast to actors simply reciting the words without the right cadence; we can equally tell that's phony. You need both, from a character and situation standpoint. So here, where there is one element that's totally foreign and destabilizing (a giant alien mothership), providing a very real dramatic anchor in the pilot's communication and demeanor provides a lot of great dramatic fuel. I just don't know, personally, how to do it, since I'm not a pilot - too short, and blind as a bat.

 

[Renegade One]

So here, where there is one element that's totally foreign and destabilizing (a giant alien mothership), providing a very real dramatic anchor in the pilot's communication and demeanor provides a lot of great dramatic fuel. I just don't know, personally, how to do it, since I'm not a pilot - too short, and blind as a bat.

"Holy shit! What the fuck is THAT?!? Christ almighty it's big! Let's get the fuck out of here!"

Yeah, that resonates with me...

 

[ea6bflyr]

My main responsibility is serving the drama; it's not a documentary, so strictly speaking, it isn't essential to capture the reality of this. But the rub here is that I believe the legitimacy actually DOES impact, positively, the drama in this case - and for many of the reasons you mention. When pilots engage in practiced, efficient brevity code, they're communicating to an audience all sorts of things about their competency, their emotional state, etc. We can tell by the cadence what's going on with them - in contrast to actors simply reciting the words without the right cadence; we can equally tell that's phony. You need both, from a character and situation standpoint. So here, where there is one element that's totally foreign and destabilizing (a giant alien mothership), providing a very real dramatic anchor in the pilot's communication and demeanor provides a lot of great dramatic fuel. I just don't know, personally, how to do it, since I'm not a pilot - too short, and blind as a bat.

So you need a well paid consultant? I'm game for the right money.... Homie don't work for free. BTW, the real communications are way too boring for a drama....that's why we have TOP GUN (the movie) not TOPGUN (the Strike-Fighter Weapons School).

 

[Brett327]

I'm of the same mind as ea6bflyr. No offense to the OP, as I appreciate the work you're trying to do, but we get someone like you that posts a similar request every few months. I think many would be willing to give general guidance on this kind of thing, but if your work is a serious and professional film, then you probably need a line in your production budget for a consultant.

 

[mverta]

I don't work for free, either, but I usually go far beyond what I'm paid to do. That's basically the case here. The production doesn't really care; they didn't line-item a consultant, and it's an independent feature.

I reached out here simply because when I'm putting my name on something I want it to be right, that's all. Nobody is obliged to help me in any way, and it doesn't make them a-holes for not doing so. But you know, it never hurts to ask, and the request is coming from a place of honor and respect.

 

[wlawr005]

Well, I've seen maybe a handful of movies where the pilots actually do briefs and checklists. Yeah, they're not exciting, but any professional aviation concern - private, government, military - the crew is reading off checklists and challenge-and-reply type stuff to each other constantly. We practice this stuff and do it so much and train so much that it's mostly muscle memory and familiarity.

My only gripe about The Martian, for example - otherwise one of my favorite movies ever - is at no point do the astronauts sound like they've done what real astronauts do, which is rehearse procedures over and over and over again, until they're spouting the procedures to each other like they have it written on their eyelids. Instead their dialogue is stuff like "Commander, do we launch?" Compare with From the Earth to the Moon or Apollo 13.

The only recent movie I can think of that did anything like this is Behind Enemy Lines, which though it was cheesy and unrealistic as hell for most of its run time, at least had the pilot and Hansel the WSO rolleyes running through an engine start check at the beginning of the movie when their alert launch gets called away.

I recall once a movie type saying that they tried to get military details right even if it wasn't essential to the plot - said something like, maybe most people won't know the difference, but for the people who will, they'll notice and appreciate it.

This checklist?

 

[Uncle Fester]

"Holy shit! What the fuck is THAT?!? Christ almighty it's big! Let's get the fuck out of here!"

Yeah, that resonates with me...

More like,
"That's a big weird alien spaceship."
"Yeah."
(long pause)
"Range 1000..."
"Roger."
(long pause)
"So if this exceeding your comfort level, say the word."
"I'm good to press. But if you're not getting a warm-fuzzy on this..."
"Nope. Continue."
"Rog"
(long pause)
"Range 800"
"Rog"
(long pause)
"Check with alpha bravo and see if they want us to keep pressing."
"Rog. You signed for the spaceship, Bongo, if you want to get out of here, it's your call."
"Nah. But see what they want to do."