SaraCoffman
Registered User
This was given to me by a Capt (Ret) NA. It is a little long, but it's funny.
From: Commanding Officer, NAAS Cabaniss Field, Corpus Christi, Texas
To: MIDN Alpha
MIDN Bravo
MIDN Charlie
Subj: Restriction to Station
1. You are hereby restricted to the confines of the station for a
period of two (2) weeks for violation of station orders and conduct unbecoming an officer candidate on Friday, 2 December 2002.
2. You are further restricted from the privileges of using the Officers Club and the BOQ beer mess for the above mentioned period.
3. You are further directed to make a statement writing to the
Commanding Officer explaining your actions on the evening of 2 December 2002.
/s/
Executive Officer
By direction
4 December 2002
From: MIDN Alpha
To: Commanding Officer, NAAS Cabaniss Field, Corpus Christi, Texas
Subj: Statement of My Actions on the Evening of 2 Dec02
Ref: (a) Your ltr dtd 3 Dec02
1. In compliance with reference (a) the following statement is submitted:
a. It is my custom each evening to proceed to the chapel where I partake of the vespers and evening prayers. The service on the evening in question was particularly lengthy, and I was required to be
on my knees for an unusually long period of time. I mentioned this only because the prolonged period of time on my knees gave me an unsteady rolling gait, as I proceeded from the chapel to the library.
b. En route to the library it was my misfortune to encounter
MIDNs Bravo and Charlie. They said, "Come on, Alpha, lets go back for another round." I assumed they referred to another round of prayers and thought it must be God's will, so I followed them.
c. Well,lo and behold, you can imagine my surprise when we
entered not the chapel but another edifice, the interior of which was most unfamiliar to me. I can only describe it as having a long, narrow, and rather high table with lots of high chairs on one side and many spigots and bottles and glasses on the other. "What is this place called?" I asked. "This is the officers club, you idiot," replied my former friends, MIDNs Bravo and Charlie.
d. Well, sir, you can imagine my surprise when I realized
alcoholic beverages were being consumed on the premises. You see, sir, I was contemplating becoming a man of the cloth at the time I entered the Navy V-5 program and had promised my mother and my parish priest that I would lead a most pure life so as to be ready for the priesthood should I prove unsuccessful as a Naval Aviation midshipman.
Before I realized what was happening, MIDNs Bravo and Charlie had
enticed me to partake of an elixir served in a copper cup claiming it would ease the pain in my knees. I thought it strange that the libation was served with a slice of lime; but as I had never been in such surroundings, I wasn't sure how to act. To be polite I had five or six of the copper cup concoctions which I learned by and by was called a "Moscow Mule."
e. Well, sir, when I learned I had been consuming alcoholic
beverages, I was deeply remorseful having broken my promise to my mother and parish priest. I ran away from that place directly to the
officers pool thinking I should drown myself for being so evil; but
before I jumped into the pool, I remembered that Navy Relief needed clothing donations, so I stripped naked and left my clothes at the
side of the pool for the needy. I regret that I didn't leave a note
with the clothing as to their intended disposition upon my demise.
f. Once again the Lord interceded on my behalf sending several
Marines to pull me out of the pool before I could drown. While I was under water awaiting the call of my maker, some scoundrel stole my
Navy Relief contribution, and I was buck naked when escorted to my BOQ room by the Marines.
2. From the foregoing it should be obvious that I am completely
innocent of conduct unbecoming an officer candidate. Had it not been for my former friends, MIDNs Bravo and Charlie, I would have easily
made it to the library without incident. Since unlike me they were aware that the concoctions being served at the long, narrow, high table were alcoholic, I think it would be appropriate for you to double their restriction and cancel mine.
Very Respectfully,
/s/
Midshipman Alpha
>
From: Commanding Officer, NAAS Cabaniss Field, Corpus Christi, Texas
To: MIDN Alpha
MIDN Bravo
MIDN Charlie
Subj: Restriction to Station
1. You are hereby restricted to the confines of the station for a
period of two (2) weeks for violation of station orders and conduct unbecoming an officer candidate on Friday, 2 December 2002.
2. You are further restricted from the privileges of using the Officers Club and the BOQ beer mess for the above mentioned period.
3. You are further directed to make a statement writing to the
Commanding Officer explaining your actions on the evening of 2 December 2002.
/s/
Executive Officer
By direction
4 December 2002
From: MIDN Alpha
To: Commanding Officer, NAAS Cabaniss Field, Corpus Christi, Texas
Subj: Statement of My Actions on the Evening of 2 Dec02
Ref: (a) Your ltr dtd 3 Dec02
1. In compliance with reference (a) the following statement is submitted:
a. It is my custom each evening to proceed to the chapel where I partake of the vespers and evening prayers. The service on the evening in question was particularly lengthy, and I was required to be
on my knees for an unusually long period of time. I mentioned this only because the prolonged period of time on my knees gave me an unsteady rolling gait, as I proceeded from the chapel to the library.
b. En route to the library it was my misfortune to encounter
MIDNs Bravo and Charlie. They said, "Come on, Alpha, lets go back for another round." I assumed they referred to another round of prayers and thought it must be God's will, so I followed them.
c. Well,lo and behold, you can imagine my surprise when we
entered not the chapel but another edifice, the interior of which was most unfamiliar to me. I can only describe it as having a long, narrow, and rather high table with lots of high chairs on one side and many spigots and bottles and glasses on the other. "What is this place called?" I asked. "This is the officers club, you idiot," replied my former friends, MIDNs Bravo and Charlie.
d. Well, sir, you can imagine my surprise when I realized
alcoholic beverages were being consumed on the premises. You see, sir, I was contemplating becoming a man of the cloth at the time I entered the Navy V-5 program and had promised my mother and my parish priest that I would lead a most pure life so as to be ready for the priesthood should I prove unsuccessful as a Naval Aviation midshipman.
Before I realized what was happening, MIDNs Bravo and Charlie had
enticed me to partake of an elixir served in a copper cup claiming it would ease the pain in my knees. I thought it strange that the libation was served with a slice of lime; but as I had never been in such surroundings, I wasn't sure how to act. To be polite I had five or six of the copper cup concoctions which I learned by and by was called a "Moscow Mule."
e. Well, sir, when I learned I had been consuming alcoholic
beverages, I was deeply remorseful having broken my promise to my mother and parish priest. I ran away from that place directly to the
officers pool thinking I should drown myself for being so evil; but
before I jumped into the pool, I remembered that Navy Relief needed clothing donations, so I stripped naked and left my clothes at the
side of the pool for the needy. I regret that I didn't leave a note
with the clothing as to their intended disposition upon my demise.
f. Once again the Lord interceded on my behalf sending several
Marines to pull me out of the pool before I could drown. While I was under water awaiting the call of my maker, some scoundrel stole my
Navy Relief contribution, and I was buck naked when escorted to my BOQ room by the Marines.
2. From the foregoing it should be obvious that I am completely
innocent of conduct unbecoming an officer candidate. Had it not been for my former friends, MIDNs Bravo and Charlie, I would have easily
made it to the library without incident. Since unlike me they were aware that the concoctions being served at the long, narrow, high table were alcoholic, I think it would be appropriate for you to double their restriction and cancel mine.
Very Respectfully,
/s/
Midshipman Alpha
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