USN Plane Captains

Discussion in 'Aviation and Military Humor' started by BusyBee604, Apr 21, 2009.

  1. BusyBee604

    BusyBee604 St. Francis/Hugh Hefner Combo! None

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    Dedicated to Brownshoe, Derf & all "Line Rats" who may happen by -

    You know you are, or were, a Plane Captain if:

    You've ever said "Oh yes sir, it's supposed to look like that."
    You've ever sucked LOX to cure a hangover.
    You know what JP-4 or JP-5 tastes like.
    You've ever used a piece of safety wire as a toothpick.
    You ever used soot from the tailpipe to blacken your boots.
    You can't figure out why maintenance officers exist.
    You consider "Moly-B" smudges on food as an "acquired taste."
    You have ever jumped inside an intake to get out of the rain.
    You looked for pictures of "your" jet in aviation books and magazines.
    You can't figure out why two weeks of advance per diem is gone after three days.
    You ever used a wheel chock or tow bar as a pillow.
    You ever stood on wheel chocks to keep your feet dry.
    You ever used a pair of dikes to trim a fingernail.
    You ever pulled the trigger while riding brakes.
    You ever wiped leaks right before a crew showed.
    You ever had to defuel your jet an hour after fueling it.
    You refer to QA as "the enemy."
    You know the international sign language for "pull your head out of your a--."
    You've wanted the jet to start just so you can warm up.
    You have ever bled hydraulic fluid Gatorade bottle or soda can because it was too hard to get a hydraulic bucket.
    You used the "pull chocks" hand signal to tell your buddies it is time to leave.
    You ever preflighted in bad weather only to learn the flight was canceled hours ago.
    You've ever been told to get some prop wash, a yard of flight line or the keys to the jet.
    You fix $30 milliion jets, but can't figure out what's wrong with your $150 lawnmower.
    Your toolbox at home has wheels and foam cutouts, just like the ones at work.
    Some of the tools in your toolbox at home have numbers etched into them.

    From "THE HOOK" Tailhook Assn. Journal of Carrier Aviation, Spring 2009
    BzB
     
  2. GO_AV8_DevilDog

    GO_AV8_DevilDog Round 2...

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    post outside of the War Zone so we can give you some real rep already :p
     
  3. brownshoe

    brownshoe Well-Known Member

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    I was guilty of a few! Chime in you "ground pounders!"

    Steve
     
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  4. dan15

    dan15 New Member

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    You wash your hands before you use the head.
     
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  5. brownshoe

    brownshoe Well-Known Member

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    No shit!:D

    Steve
     
  6. FMRAM

    FMRAM Combating TIP training AGAIN?!

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    You just gained a whole new measure of respect in my book Sir!


    You have been thrown up on by hydraulic fluid or fuel, or both.
    You know what aircraft cleaning compound tastes like.
    You ever felt depressed because there was an empty seat on a launch and you weren't in it.
    Ever got chewed out by the MO for the skittles that "your guys" left in the cockpit. :)
    Ever had to explain to the MX Chief that you couldn't complete the 14 day because the water was freezing to the aircraft.
     
  7. jus2mch

    jus2mch MOTIVATOR

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    You know the amount of cranks it takes to get out of the cockpit of a jet with with a dead battery.
     
  8. HeyJoe

    HeyJoe Fly Navy! ...or USMC None

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    Fixed that by moving it
     
  9. brownshoe

    brownshoe Well-Known Member

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    Thanks! Heyjoe and I PM'd, stuff is being moved for, Hugh.:)

    Steve
     
  10. GO_AV8_DevilDog

    GO_AV8_DevilDog Round 2...

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    I'm going to unleash my 5 Rep power fury as soon as my 24 hours reset ;)
     
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  11. brownshoe

    brownshoe Well-Known Member

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    ;)

    Steve
     
  12. eddie

    eddie Working Plan B

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    Rep still has a refractory period?
     
  13. Alpha_Echo_606

    Alpha_Echo_606 Unknown Member™

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    I am guilty of many, and yet to this day! :D
     
  14. GO_AV8_DevilDog

    GO_AV8_DevilDog Round 2...

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    apparently
     
  15. HueyCobra8151

    HueyCobra8151 Well-Known Member None

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    You beat me to it.

    Oh yeah, not only does a little Dexron make you puke...it also causes cancer...oops.

    -You know what goes on in flight-e and clean everything that touches your body or mouth before you use it.
    -You have or know someone who has safety-wired their hands up in the hellhole so they could sleep and still look busy.
    -You know that a creeper in the back of tool room is the most comfortable place to sleep in the world.
    -You have almost fell off a helicopter laughing at bulk fuel trying (and failing) to taxi a helicopter.
    -You know someone (hopefully it wasn't you) who got suckered into putting their mouth on or around the piss tube.
     

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