My situation is a little different...my boyfriend and I have talked about getting married, already intended on doing it, but OCS kinda sped things up a bit for us. So we will be getting married before I leave for OCS. So what makes it "not a stupid decision" for us? He did 4 years enlisted, got out, and joined the National Guard...therefore, still enlisted. Officer/enlisted policies would prevent us from seeing each other if we're not married prior to my leaving. He was on sea duty for 4 years, so he knows what it's like. We've also both been married before, so we're not jumping into it blind. Just sharing my story.
If you are at all concerned with having time to be with your future baby, the Navy is not the place for you. Sure, you can manage to get a short hiatus from being deployed, but you will still likely be at sea for months and months at a time with an 18 month at home, and a 4 year old at home who knows just enough to know that mommy has left her. If you want great maternity leave, don't join the military. In fact, might I suggest Canada for that? As for marriage, I am very firm believer in the notion that no one should get married unless and until they feel absolutely compelled to do so. Yes, you'd get a few extra dollars, healthcare, and the right for your husband to shop at the commisary. That really isn't much, and it certainly isn't enough to serve as motivation to enter into a legally binding contract that you are lukewarm -at best- about. And as an FYI, I am a happily married Navy spouse, so it isn't like I am just blindly anti-marriage.
To the original poster however. If you choose not to heed the pages and pages of advice given you, Ive got a ring Ill sell you cheap.
I love how first time posters like come on this site to ask for advice...get it (from winged commissioned officers) ...then figure that they are special and don't heed it.
Hahaha I loved that picture! And yes, I WILL heed all of the advice given even though I am a special butterfly. j/k Besides, where is a better place to get info about the military that from actual military officers and enlisted? That is the main reason that I asked and I love getting new opinions/ideas. This site has been a huge help. Thanks!
the internet is a great resource for opinions/ideas on "what should I major in", "what kind of car should I get with my USAA loan", "where should I go to get shitfaced every night", and "who should I buy my AWG's from" getting married is something that you need to decide for yourself.
You don't say? I think the sentiment of this thread is not to rush into a marriage just because one happens to be going to OCS, deploying, PCS, ect.
haha, I got where that was going I was leaning toward, the "asking online about marriage is asinine no matter the reason"
In a word....hormones Just watch the speech in My Cousin Vinny by Marisa Tomei about her biological clock by
Or get married, don't have kids, and buy the ex a porsche and house. And then some. Or stay single and buy yourself the Porsche. Closest I get to Porsches is driving by the dealership or trying not to drool on HeyJoe's at Tailhook events.
I think the best I can do is no kid, and my parent's Solstice when they dont want it anymore...after 10 years...>sigh<
Hey, if all you need is a piece of paper my happy ass is ordained, I'll hook you up for a case of beer... As far as kids, I only took 4 days off when I had my daughter in advanced, but then again I didn't have to be used as overhead storage for 9 months... If you guys are common-law anyway and don't really care about the religious/legal aspects, sign a pre-nup and enjoy your extra BAH... Pickle
He worked VERY hard for those 4 whole days, too... :icon_rage As a spouse, he needs to realize that he's going to take the brunt of everything. From you, from the Navy, from everyone... ...and no, MB, it's not that hard to be a spouse, so don't start that... Anyway, the only thing that hasn't made me run for the hills, was that I actually DO love Pickle. (I don't like him most days, but DO love him...) As all the other people on here have said, this is something YOU need to decide...
So you LOVE pickle, but don't like him most days... How many days do you like his paycheck :icon_smil
I would have loved yours more, but you married some other fat bitch first! Now, stay back before I sit on you!
hmmm...... are common-law marriages still legal anymore? just out of curiosity's sake... Mrs. Pickle, I agree with you and Mr. Pickle, just a case of beer? well, cheaper than a judge!
They're still legal but I don't think the military recognizes them. I'm sure 18 million of you will post to say I'm wrong and fat and stupid. Bring it. :icon_boxi
BTW. I did an extensive search (to no avail) of the thread we were talking about cheating and all of that stuff.... Someone recommended this book: If I could find out who it was, I'd give em rep... Bought it off Amazon... Was a great and informative read. I highly recommend people considering marriage read it first. Thanks again to whoever posted it.
