Personal Statement

Discussion in 'Enlisted Commissioning Programs' started by mblanche, Sep 18, 2007.

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  1. mblanche

    mblanche New Member

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    I am applying for the FY09 STA-21 Program. I was wondering if people are willing to read over my personal statement and provide feedback? Also, should I post it, or PM it to those willing to participate.
    Thanks for any feedback!
     
  2. jus2mch

    jus2mch MOTIVATOR

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    If you PM it to me I will review it.
     
  3. skim

    skim Teaching MIDN how to drift a BB None

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    I can too
     
  4. HH-60H

    HH-60H Pilot None

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    You can PM it to me if you want. Keep in mind that I have not applied for an Officer program in over 13 years.
     
  5. fc2spyguy

    fc2spyguy HSC-22 None

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    I can take a look at it if you want.
     
  6. Nose

    Nose Active Member None

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    Q: How many people does it take to write a "personal" statement?
     
    A4sForever likes this.
  7. A4sForever

    A4sForever INTERNET BULLY None

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    Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh ..... excellent. :icon_wink

    Someone has finally said it. I wish it were I who "popped the cork" on this particular bottle .... :)

    Personally, just thinking here .... just free association and all .... I'm stunned and amazed that I was ever able to obtain a four year scholarship AND a USN commission AND get through flight school ..... without the community's help ..... simply stunned and amazed.

    A: I guess Hillary's right ..... it really DOES take a village, after all ... ???

    Good luck in life, mblanche .....
     
  8. Brett1

    Brett1 Banned

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    The bigger problem is that it is intellectually dishonest to seek help writing your statement.
     
  9. skim

    skim Teaching MIDN how to drift a BB None

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    I bought 'navyguides' from www.navyguides.com and it has a section that tells you what you should focus on in the motivational statement, is that dishonest? Is seeking gouge for the astb dishonest? To place my statement (which I placed here before it became such an issue) online for a proof read, and to get advice from those who have recently been selected is not dishonest. Maybe, a sticky should be made for motivational statement gouge as well.
     
  10. snake020

    snake020 Active Member

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    Relax everyone... poster never asked anyone to WRITE his statement, he just said he wanted feedback. Can anyone here tell me they never asked a friend to lend a more objective set of eyes on a paper they'd written?

    Now that we're all clear everyone is welcome to buy me alcohol when I redeploy home next week. [/threadjack]
     
  11. MasterBates

    MasterBates Well-Known Member

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    Lawyer taling about honesty.. Beezlebub is calling the furnace repairman as we speak.
     
  12. jus2mch

    jus2mch MOTIVATOR

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    Is this kind of like when my COC asked me if I wrote my CO's endorsement yet?
     
  13. A4sForever

    A4sForever INTERNET BULLY None

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    Skool daze ... ??? Never. Not even once.

    Military ...??? Never. Not even once.

    Civie street ... ??? The issue never came up until later in life, and now I do it all the time. Ask, that is .... :)
     
  14. robav8r

    robav8r . . . just a thought from a worn out arm chair. None

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    What some folks are trying to say (IMO) is: the "personal statement" is a reflection of your professional attitude, confidence and just plain "how hungry" you are. I have sat on many boards to recommend enlisted folks for OCS, STA-21, LDO/CWO, etc and I can tell you that their personal statement tells me a lot about who and what they are. Often, I think to myself, that a statement I'm reading is not the way I would have expressed the same sentiment, but it's powerful, genuine and "personal." When I read your personal statement, I want it to match the "look in your eye" and the "fire in your belly." Make sense ??? ;)
     
  15. mblanche

    mblanche New Member

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    A4sforever (and others), my mistake for offending you. I didn't realize I started this thread to flame people, thanks for the good luck wishes. I am sure I'll need it.

    Feedback: "a reaction or response to a particular process or activity" and "evaluative information derived from such a reaction or response"
    I am suprised as well.
     
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